Kids: Today, I was in my backyard scolding my cat. I yelled, "If you...

By flaggurl - 10/03/2009 01:16 - United States

Today, I was in my backyard scolding my cat. I yelled, "If you can't learn to use the bathroom correctly then I am going to leave your stupid butt out here in the snow until you figure it out!!" Later, my neighbor left me a nasty note about child abuse - she thought I was scolding my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 080

You deserved it 12 219

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Same thing different taste

By wekasdjkasldasdkasdzcawqe - 07/08/2013 20:55 - Sweden

Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 075

You deserved it 5 690

By whymomwhy - 11/07/2015 17:20 - United States - Salem

Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 341

You deserved it 2 880

By sammyxoxo - 18/12/2011 08:32 - Canada

Today, I stepped into a pile of dog shit on my doorstep, along with a note saying, "Keep your dog out of my yard." I don't own a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 769

You deserved it 2 771

By I'veRunOuttaPatience - 31/08/2018 03:30

Today, I got scolded for how I treated my aunt and uncle's dogs while pet sitting. I was told it was my fault they had explosive diarrhea for "locking" them in the room they'd told me to put them in at night and doing everything they said when I reported they were sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 064

You deserved it 222

Vengeance is mine

By shitty neighbor - 25/07/2021 10:01 - United States

Today, I had to call the cops on my neighbor. I was heading off to work when I saw him actually shitting in our yard. The reason? They caught my dumbass rebel of a son on their security camera, shitting in their yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 458

A Caturday surprise

By fucking cat - 02/03/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, I shut the door to the bedroom so my wife and I could have a serious talk. Unfortunately, the cat stuck his paw under the door and started flailing around, causing me to bust up laughing at a bad moment. My wife was furious, threw a water bottle at me, and locked me out overnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 212

By I'm a pussy, yeah yeah - 05/09/2015 05:56 - United States - Lake Elsinore

Today, my psycho cat stood on my toilet seat and challenged me to a stand-off. After 10 minutes, I couldn't hold it in any more and asked to use my neighbor's bathroom instead. I told him my toilet was broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 950

You deserved it 10 003

By thecathater - 09/07/2013 13:35 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I found out that I'd been wrong to constantly accuse next door's cat of peeing on my car every night. It was actually my 16-year-old son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 820

You deserved it 7 110

Let cats be cats

By Anonymous - 28/02/2022 06:00

Today, I disciplined my cat for meowing too loudly in my apartment and disturbing neighbors by picking her up by the scruff. She then proceeded to scratch the ever living crap out of my hand, now it looks like Wolverine got a hold of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265

You deserved it 2 171

By Anonymous - 19/04/2013 23:33 - Sweden - Ljungby

Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 109

You deserved it 6 026

Gringo_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 12:04

More like **** the cat's life......

ohdamn_fml 2

Tuesday 10 March 2009 12:28

Cats never listen to you, don't waste your breath. Buy a spray bottle

Comments

Gringo_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 14:51

#6, when i call my cat she answers, when i say come here she comes, when i say shut up she lays on the floor..... They're intelligent animals

PsyPako 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 15:45

Maybe you should take your neighbor to the backyard and put his stupid butt on snow until him figure out that it's not a good idea to listen someone else talk.

Callyn 47

Tuesday 10 March 2009 17:03

How could you throw a cat out in the snow? It's not like he would know what you're punishing him for, you're just going to make him freeze to death.

greenman_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 17:36

You should have taken the cat out to the back and shot it for getting you in trouble with your neighbors

cat_girl 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 17:54

Are you trying to make the cat go outside for the bathroom? That is a little strange for a cat to do, isn't it?

jim69_fml 0

Sunday 24 October 2010 22:53

ummm are you stupid?

discoinferno 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 18:31

Cats don't use a bathroom, they use a litter box. Why would you say "learn to use the bathroom"?

bsneeze 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 18:35

i just giggled out loud.

melange_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 18:59

What kind of person thinks scolding is verbal abuse? Discipline is important for children! Gotta keep those nasty ******* in line!

jouhou 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 19:09

@3, 14, & 20 You seriously think yelling at your kid and locking him outside the house in the freezing cold for not using the bathroom correctly is acceptable parenting?

tisiphone_fml 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 23:25

No, but scaring the living daylights out of the kid by making him -think- it will happen works --really-- well. Nosy neighbor should have left his or her nose out of your business, regardless, unless a kid was really left outside. Hope you replied to the note and embarrassed the hell out of him or her. I love my cats, but other than gathering that you're angry, they really don't understand what you're saying. I think at one point or another, every cat or dog owner has said something to their pet. Just... don't leave the cat outside in the cold, either.