Today, I was helping some neighbors corral and tag their cattle. Deciding to take a break, I turned my back to all 3 men and jumped down from an old, rusty gate. Luckily, the sharp piece of metal sticking out of it barely missed my skin. Instead it tore off the ass of both my pants and undies. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, at work, the seat of my pants ripped open. A coworker lent me a pair of his back-up jeans, and then those ripped in the crotch. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store. I bent to get some dog food off the bottom shelf and felt my pants tear. My jeans split right across the back seam, showing everyone I was wearing a pink thong under them. I had to ditch my cart and leave as I had no way to cover myself. FML
Today, I went to the park with my friend and we decided to swing. While we were swinging, we decided to jump off backwards. All would have worked out fine if my pants hadn't gotten caught on the metal of the swing, leaving my bare butt exposed. The man who was in the park with his daughter left. FML
Today, I was at work and caught my pants on the corner of the door hinge. They tore completely open and my hairy cheek was exposed for the whole office to see. FML
Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML
Today, I was riding my bike to the local grocery store to pick up some supplies for dinner. On the way down, traveling down a hill, I hit a drain with no lid. I went to grab hold of the nearest object to soften my fall. That nearest object was a barbed wire fence. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog around the block, I fell in the splits position on wet dirt and ripped my pants right on the front. I then had to walk home casually holding a chihuahua on my crotch hoping I would not run into anyone. FML
Today, I was hiking, and four miles away from my car and civilization, I tripped over a rock into a cactus. I used duct tape, which ripped all the hair off my arms and legs but ignored the spikes. FML
Today, I was leaning over a fence in a pasture to get a closer look at something. Nobody warned my nuts that it was an electric fence. FML
Today, I was trying on clothes in a store that had just screens set up for changing. As I took off the first pair of pants had I tried on, my foot got hooked in the cuff and I fell out in my underwear in front of the whole store. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
TrevorDeere 4
I love cowgirls
mollymaykitty 0
ouch. that sucks. I've done that in front of my brother-in-law.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (127)
EllyH 0
auch..
zwilli3 0
Nice picture (2nd) !
MadaZer0 8
What female would have a hairy ass? Unless she inherited that trait from her dad I say she should has slashed her ass so that the Doctors would take care of it lol.
SomeonesGoneDie 0
snickerdoodles, maybe if you stop saying dumb stuff and keep commenting back at other people so much, then you wouldn't be known as the "bitch of fmylife.com" Love, The Troll Hunter :D
MermaidSongXOXO 6
Snickerdoodles, people might respect you more if you stopped correcting them. Arguing on the internet is like competing in the Special Olympics: Even if you win, you're still retarded. Let people type the way they want, use incorrect grammar, whatever----and if they say something stupid, they'll just sound like an idiot. I personally don't think you're a bitch or anything because of it, but you have to notice how many people are sick of you correcting them. Just chill, and maybe you'll make some friends on here :)
lagginwaggin 0
it's okay snicker, I love you even if you look like a 12 year old boy with a wig <3
SomeonesGoneDie 0
MermaidSong, THANK YOU!!!!! I couldn't have worded that better myself :D
SomeonesGoneDie 0
AMEN!
CabinFeverrr 0
how do you hate snickerdoodle il(her) comments and think she is hilarious x.x she owns :P
SomeonesGoneDie 0
Kriptonite, you sir..... ARE ******* HALARIOUS!!! *cyber high five*
SomeonesGoneDie 0
I am complete ^.^
airforce987 20
actually her name is carrot top
lickmyjock 0
I love snickerdoodles she's my girl.
Tripout 0
I agree ^^^ well as far as everyone hating on snickerdoodles. but what he wants u to suck on well Ima have to pass with that. but really there is no reason for everyone to be gangin up on her why don't u just actually LISTEN to her for once n ull see that u don't have to worry about her bein "a bitch" when n reality u know that she has stronger arguements than u can handle
sadistmonkey 19
Yes, because agreement necessarily makes people "conformist losers". And seriously, "conformist"? Go back to high school.
NeonWar__ 0
I do dislike snickerdoodles because she just talks crap. She knocks people over nothing. she talks about having respect for people but she puts people down for spelling mistakes. Some people are not good at spelling (namely myself) and what about typos? People don't proof read on the internet! She being a bitch for no reason and she's getting hated because of it. She should grow up and stop nitpicking at every little thing to appear better. She's a bellend.
Ascaryrobot 0
I agree with someone1989. Wait, does that make me a conformist loser for agreeing with him? Well **** me, looks like we got a conundrum. Zapp: "Rock crushes scissors! But paper covers rock. And scissors cuts paper! Kif, we have a conundrum." Kif: *sigh* Zapp: "Search them for paper! And ... bring me a rock!"
bethan1 4
i thinked it were perty clever myself
MXavierT 0
I now hate snickerdoodles even though I've only ever seen like 2 of her comments.
NeonWar__ 0
since people were calling her Ginger she changed the picture to one that doesn't show her hair. LMAO I'm ginger, I don't care!
awesomechica1229 5
awww... poor snickerdoodles isn't this the second time today that people have jumped on you for having an opinion? maybe it's time to call it a day?
Roary 0
i'd tap #1!
racerapj 10
Oh man here we go again... Run the F-bombs are comming! (Runs to the bomb chamber)
Tenebrae 0
I realise there are a ton of replies before mine, but.. #132, I find that little (old) "arguing on the Internet" to be ironic, for lack of a better word. If you don't like what someone says or does, it is best to ignore it -I really doubt you, or anybody, telling them what they can do to improve themselves and make others like them will actually effect them in any direct way. You'll save time and energy by just skimming over their posts.
Tenebrae 0
Urg. Meant 32, not 132. I kinda feel like I didn't get my first idea across, at that, but I really do suck at typing with this iPod Touch, so I won't bother for now.
nightELFassasin6 0
u need to shut up
Tenebrae 0
"u" being me or being everyone who's been arguing about this and that?
lilbz76 0
How bout if they arent mistakes, what if thats what you meant to type. like how i dont capitalize, and don't use fricken yes i said fricken and all my "mistakes"are underlined, apostraphes, or even give a crap how something is spelled. Phew, glad thats ouuta my system. No but really, I just got on this site and i noticed that people are really uptight, RELAX YOUR SPHINCTERS, ITS ALL IN GOOD FUN! For me that is, i dont know what some of you are so stressed about, dont you know ,stress kills.
lolroflmao 0
this has to be one of the longest set of comments I hav ever seen -_-
Bullet4MyChemaMo 12
Snickerdoodles, you just spelled 'kripotonite' wrong. It's kryptonite.
Bullet4MyChemaMo 12
Whoops, didn't realise that Kriptonite is a username. My glory at correcting Snickerdoodles was short-lived. Sigh.
TrevorDeere 4
I love cowgirls
MermaidSongXOXO 6
Cows aren't the only mammals to produce manure... Just sayin' In that situation, you could've at least TRIED to be resourceful and use the opportunity at hand :P
Ajjas013 6
Tara is an expert at this :)
CallMeHush 1
@3 I'm with you there! OP, pics or it didn't happen.
Ajjas013 6
LMFAO
Cjw1220 0
Sounds like the begginig of a **** film.
mollymaykitty 0
ouch. that sucks. I've done that in front of my brother-in-law.
Soybean254 0
why do people assume whenever an FML happens someone happens to have a camera and take picture of it happening
cameronparty 0
it's called a camera phone!!
CallMeHush 1
@soybean, sorry to have offended your sensibilities, actually come here for fun and try never to be serious. Seriously!
CallMeHush 1
{edit} I actually damn touch.
Ajjas013 6
I know it makes a lot of mistakes, but in some cases the mobile version is better :)
fml98kevin 4
im with Ajjas
drizzydrake808 4
Shut ur fat donkey ass up!grammar Nazi these nutz!
PwnerJohn 0
should be happy it missed you. Could've been worse
p3rfect_ins4nity 0
shouldn't have messed with them damn animals lol YDI!
ilovebradiew 0
pretty lucky tho :P
p3rfect_ins4nity 0
hahaha gingerdoodles! that's hilarious kriptonight123 ur my hero lol
MadaZer0 8
You'll manage! My doctor would say, "it's only a flesh wound" <.<
Tenebrae 0
Your doctor, unless you're a soldier, sounds awful.