Animals: Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the...

By smellsofeggs - 26/11/2009 21:13 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 058

You deserved it 8 497

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Same thing different taste

By Annie - 22/11/2009 22:07 - Mexico

Today, I noticed that my dog was feeling sad. I let him hop on my bed with me to make him feel better. It worked, right after he vomited all over my face and pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 664

You deserved it 6 010

By anonamous - 12/03/2012 21:45 - United States

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 159

You deserved it 9 119

By killjoyx - 23/07/2015 18:28 - United States - Suffolk

Today, when I woke up, my dog excitedly came up to me and licked my face. A few minutes later, I find out he had thrown up twice before he licked my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 800

You deserved it 3 183

By Anonymous - 15/12/2013 06:47 - United States - Fresno

Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 362

You deserved it 35 751

By furryfriend - 16/09/2014 18:46 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I was home sick and playing with my dog. I suddenly felt the urge to throw up, so I sprinted to the bathroom. My dog thought this was an invitation to chase me and tackle me to the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 090

You deserved it 3 957

By Anonymous - 31/07/2015 18:55 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was changing my clothes with my dog in the room. As I took off my shirt, he looked at me, ran into the corner, and threw up. Well that's a confidence booster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 682

You deserved it 2 797

By Brinty - 16/09/2009 02:43 - Australia

Today, I was napping with my boyfriend and his dog. The dog was making odd coughing noises, but my boyfriend refused to kick him out of the bed. A few moments later, I rolled onto my stomach, into a pile of dog vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 679

You deserved it 4 556

By dogggg - 14/07/2014 02:10 - India - Pune

Today, I caught my dog drinking from the toilet. After yelling at him, his apology was licking my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 733

You deserved it 9 629

By Anonymous - 20/12/2012 19:50 - Spain - Santa Cruz De Tenerife

Today, I was woken up by my dog scratching at my door. After a while of this, I finally got up to let her in. When I opened the door, she looked at me, threw up, and scurried away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 991

You deserved it 9 662

By ginya - 07/06/2016 01:58 - United States - Bedford

Today, my sister asked me to let her dog out of the kennel when I got home. I did only to have the little beast bite me. She then ate the entire content of the cat's litter box, which she couldn't keep down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 468

You deserved it 1 081

shananigans 0

Friday 27 November 2009 1:45

Please please give us the link to that video!!

breenarae25 0

Sunday 24 October 2010 4:01

who said he was recording?

Comments

Kaeli_lvee 0

Friday 27 November 2009 2:03

yeaaaa..link?

xoxcinderellaxox 0

Friday 27 November 2009 2:10

fake.

imperfectclarity 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:00

It was love vomit. He was just demonstrating how much he loves you.

bmonehh 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:03

The fml changed.....?

Username72999 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:07

Yeah, I don't get it either. Someone explain.

jeanii_fml 4

Friday 27 November 2009 3:12

Whoa, that is weird.

alex_vik 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:51

Yeah, I was like "Didn't this have another couple sentences about YouTube and her dad recording this in it before?".

fmylifeer 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:50

http://ihatejade.com/?id=822xfiyicino9jm86fbmvc5sd30wxu

whoismgmt 0

Friday 27 November 2009 4:24

yeah this did change... have you ever tried to search for the author by the way? Ive never found one...

1234five 0

Friday 27 November 2009 4:57

Why are like 90% of these fml stories about vomit!?

meanie_monday 0

Friday 27 November 2009 5:27

I love how they changed the fml. They just want people to shut up and stop criticizing the mods. *chuckles*

loninessYman 0

Friday 27 November 2009 5:41

F your life

gpstyne 0

Friday 27 November 2009 6:19

stfu YDI for being a douche this isn't an FML FAIL

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I spent ages writing a draft press release as part of a copywriting job application. I worked really hard and read it through several times before submitting. They emailed me to point out that I'd misspelled the name of the company. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 750

You deserved it 2 660

Today, my dad brought home a used hunk of junk from someone he knew. It was covered in rust and dents, and the engine was making weird noises. Thinking he was being generous, he said to me, "When you get your license, you'll be driving it!" It then died with a loud bang and black smoke from under the hood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 84

The Top

Today, I found I’m pregnant. I hooked up with my ex when my now boyfriend and I had broken up for a week. My ex doesn’t want kids. It’s most likely my ex's kid. My boyfriend has now proposed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 2 802

Today, I got back from a fun vacation I took with my husband. During the vacation, I participated in a wet t-shirt contest and a bunch of pictures of me flashing my breasts and waving my t shirt over my head during the contest got posted online. My whole office is teasing me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 1 010

Today, I had to listen to my mum and grandma planning a funeral for my grandpa. Who isn't dead yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 473

You deserved it 2 702

Today, I went on a Tinder date with a guy who said, "Good girl" whenever I said anything that he agreed with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 282

Today, after years of telling my boyfriend I don't do anal, I agreed to try it once just to get him to stop whining about it. He was so gung-ho that he tried to force it in without doing enough "relaxing preparation" and he split the muscle around my ring. Now I need surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 154

You deserved it 911

Today, it's been two years since I won a romantic dinner for two from a work raffle. It's been two years and I still haven't found anyone to go with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 124

Same thing different taste

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