Today, I was hanging out with my friends. My friend started talking about how unfair it is that women can use their breasts to get promotions. I told him that he has no place to talk, as he used his "d*ck" a few months ago with his female boss. His girlfriend of 3 years was sitting next to me. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I visited a friend at work with a couple of other friends. We like to play pranks, so we went to his register and started loudly discussing our masturbation habits as a joke. Some bitch complained, and his boss fired him and kicked us all out. FML
Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML
Today, while sitting at a table in a coffee shop, I overheard someone on the next table talking about their horrible boss. I joined in, complaining about mine, and going into great detail about what an arsehole he can be. Turns out, I was talking to my boss's sister. FML
Today, after two months without sex, my new coworker began telling me about how his ex dumped him after fucking all his friends. The only response I could muster was, “Well, I wish I knew you better.” That got HR involved. FML
Today, I got a promotion because my boss “accidentally” had sex with my wife. FML
Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML
Today, I introduced the girl I was talking to my best friend, and we all hung out. Until this day, her and I were doing great. After my friend left, she started gushing about how hot he is. He wasn't hitting on her at all. I reminded her that, and that he has a girlfriend. She was calm, but visibly upset. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging about me to his friends, telling them I have a great smile, cute hair, and very perky tits. This wouldn't be so bad if we weren't both men. FML
Today, I found out that the girl I like is fucking my friend. The friend who she always said was "a disgusting sexist pig" and swore she hated. The worst part is, she's right, he's a complete dick to women. I don't know how or why he got in her pants. FML
Today, I overheard my husband of 3 years talking to our boss, an attractive blonde. She was telling him that she couldn't believe he was with me. She thinks I'm fat and ugly and that he's hot. He said, "She's not that bad…" We work in the same store and she follows him around like a puppy. FML
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Top comments
EffYoLife 14
well thats what he gets for cheating on his girlfriend. if he didnt do that, you wouldnt have had that story to tell. so oh well FHL (eff HIS life)
EmmjayHEY 0
smooooooth
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Comments (102)
k1w1 0
agreed, but the smart girlfriend would probably have asked her boyfriend about it laterr. he was screwed from the moment he cheated.
ilovemydoodle123 0
ok well if that is true, he totally deserved it.
randomsmurf 0
FATALITY! FLAWLESS VICTORY!
cookiemonsterxox_fml 0
You deserve sht for not keeping antthig quiet. Your such a tatle.
asherah14 7
Learn to type/spell
mk58 31
Go back to school please.
dakins 0
every1 is blaming this guy no1s even talking about how massive of a dick his bro is. priority?
ars29 7
bros before hos man
withered 30
He did that. His "bro" is the hoe.
ThogTheCaveman 7
Not really. All in all, OP was being considerate. How many girls do you know who want to be told that the guy they've been dating for years is a faithless bastard?
SonjaJay 0
You idiot.
derskittles 5
Well he shouldn't be such a hypocrit. He totally deserved to get served. And not to mention his gf needs to know so she can dump his bitch ass.
woody768 0
your a dick...