Love, Work, Sex and Awkward: Bigmouth strikes again - FML

Bigmouth strikes again

By Anonymous - 28/08/2022 16:00

Spicy

Today, after two months without sex, my new coworker began telling me about how his ex dumped him after fucking all his friends. The only response I could muster was, “Well, I wish I knew you better.” That got HR involved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 1 198

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/03/2014 06:56 - United States

Today, during my dinner break, I was forced to listen to a coworker talk about how he dumped his needy ex for another woman. I'm the ex. We kept our relationship secret from our coworkers. I guess now I know why he dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 059

You deserved it 5 904

Great timing

By letdown - 19/07/2020 14:01

Spicy

Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 604

You deserved it 723

Freudian slip

By Anonymous - 04/03/2024 13:00 - United States - Rolling Meadows

Spicy

Today, during sex, my (now ex) boyfriend called out the name of the new female coworker that he told me just last night "not to worry about." He's known her for a week. We were together for 8 and a half years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 139

By workhoe - 20/02/2017 06:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had sex with a coworker I've had my eye on for awhile. Immediately after, he turned on the light and got on his phone. Me, trying to start a conversation, I said, "Well, that was fun." He looked at me and said, "Was it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 006

You deserved it 1 760

Sneaky but clever

By Sorryfornotbeinggoodenough - 19/02/2022 18:00

Today, I found out that the coworker I’d been crushing on told me he was gay so I wouldn’t hit on him anymore. Turns out he did that so he could focus on wooing a female coworker of mine. They’re now dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 682

You deserved it 691

Caught

By Anonanon - 12/07/2011 17:10 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after, he gave me the "let's just be friends" speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex-girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 923

You deserved it 13 842

Snitch

By Cerie - 06/10/2022 16:00

Today, I confronted my coworker, who I had a crush on, for lying to me. He’d told me he was gay when I asked him out. He’s now dating another coworker of mine who’s a woman. He took this up with my boss, and I was written up for “creating a hostile work environment.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 1 991

Edit King

By Cianna - 15/12/2021 23:01

Spicy

Today, I dumped my coworker boyfriend because I caught him cheating with another coworker. He reported me for sexual harassment, and showed my boss the consensual texts we shared during our relationship. Turns out he edited them to make it look like I was the one “harassing” him. Sucks to be jobless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 657

You deserved it 285

By csor027 - 29/09/2010 06:33 - United States

Today, I was having a good talk with a coworker and I was excited that I've made my first friend at work. After sharing some stories and some laughs he asked if I had a boyfriend. I said I do. He asked if I was always faithful, I said I was. He then walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 566

You deserved it 4 636

By Cissy - 27/12/2018 00:00

Today, my former coworker called to ask if he could get it on with my ex-husband. The same ex I was married to for 20 years without knowing anything about his other life. I've been replaced by an overweight, middle-aged furry. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2 450

You deserved it 269

Next

Top comments

jc1015 25

Sunday 28 August 2022 21:01

put in a counter complaint about the unsolicited sex talk

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Sunday 28 August 2022 17:15

If you're the kind of person who would ruin a friendship just because you've gone two whole months without sex, the reason women are sleeping with you seems less mysterious.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 28 August 2022 16:07

You had a threesome with your coworker and HR?

The_Real_Cvh 10

Sunday 28 August 2022 17:01

And there I was wishing I knew his ex better.

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Sunday 28 August 2022 17:12

You get to know him better, you get to know her a lot better. It's a 2 for 1 deal.

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Sunday 28 August 2022 17:15

If you're the kind of person who would ruin a friendship just because you've gone two whole months without sex, the reason women are sleeping with you seems less mysterious.

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Monday 29 August 2022 7:21

*aren't

jc1015 25

Sunday 28 August 2022 21:01

put in a counter complaint about the unsolicited sex talk

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I fulfilled my lifelong dream of going on a family trip to Disneyland. Less than two hours in the park, my kids have been scared shitless by every single character, they don’t want to ride any rides, my husband is drunk, and the mouse ears headband gave me a vomit-inducing migraine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 150

You deserved it 361

Today, my brother and sister-in-law come over ONLY to use up the resources at our house - like food, TV subscriptions, and other items. They claim to love my kids and come over for them. If only they would look up from their phone and spend actual time with the kids. Is there a way to block toxic relatives? FML

I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 104

The Top

Today, one of my worst nightmares as an overweight woman came true. My boyfriend showed me a video someone had recorded of us exercising together, and who was mocking my weight the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 141

Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 660

You deserved it 51 504

Today, I found out that my sister's kids refer to me as their 'Drunkle'. I guess I have to admit to myself that I'm an alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 934

You deserved it 16 231

Today, I heard my 2-year-old sister crying, so I left my room to comfort her. She looked at me, held my hand, escorted me back to my room and closed the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 687

You deserved it 3 087

Today, after several months desperately searching for a job and feeling pretty insecure and unimportant, I drove 15 miles to a job interview. On parking my car at the destination, I found that during my drive a spider had been making a cobweb between the car and my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 077

You deserved it 1 837

Today, my mom finally believed me when I said I smelled mold. I lifted up the couch, and it was covered in mold. So were the bottoms of all our furniture, our beds, and my grandma's vintage chair. We've been living in mold for the past 4 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 625

You deserved it 5 002