Today, I was giving a tour on campus when one of my friends approached us and said, "Don't go here, the weed's too expensive." and walked away. Thinking he was coming back to say he's joking, he instead says, "Just kidding, it's really cheap." and walked off. I may or may not still have a job. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I arrived at the pizza place I work at to find that I'd been fired. Apparently, the class stoner came in last night and not only demanded a free pizza, but also claimed that I always gave him one. I've never talked to this kid in my life, but my boss still doesn't believe me. FML
Today, I was walking around my college campus when someone asked me if I'd gotten separated from my tour group. He didn't believe me when I said I was a student here. This happens all the time. FML
Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML
Today, after my close friend had his baby, he told me that he was no longer going to be selling weed at his house. I was happy for him, because it's unsafe. Until I found out he was still selling at my house with the help of my roommates, without telling me. FML
Today, I got fired for failing a drug test for weed. My boss is the one who sells me weed. FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML
Today, I was getting lunch at a fast food restaurant. My boss was in front of me, and in order to get on his good side I offered to pay. Instead, I got fired because I guess my boss assumed I was making fun of his salary, which I knew nothing about. FML
Today, my coworker paid me back the $15 I let him borrow and we shook hands. Later, I was called into my boss's office, where he threatened to fire me for doing a drug deal in front of customers. The police are getting involved. FML
Today, I left early from a trashy dance and bought a soda at a Shell station. The clerk asked me if I had been smoking weed. When I replied, "No", he said, "You mean you always look like that?" FML
Today, I went to a going away party for a coworker. I had brought weed for the party and at one point a guy asked me if I have a Grindr. I replied, "No, I don't use those dating apps. I do have a Fetlife but that's it, if you want it." He apparently meant a weed grinder. Most awkward 3 hours ever. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
SpunkT 0
Yeah why would you be responsible for having an idiot friend? Also you could have just said something to the effect of "Don't mind him, he's an idiot" and pretend he's not your friend. And then later tell him not to bother you when you're working cause it's really rude.
24788 7
I do stupid things like this all the time to my friends. You need to lighten up and relax about it.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (91)
Maaarinouuu 3
ahahahaa your friend is the best hahahahahhaa. i bet you have loads of fun withh that homieeeee!
Mortal_Light 0
I can't see how you can get fired for that . Its a college campus; stuff like that happens all the time. This is not an FML.
Maaarinouuu 3
ahahahaa your friend is the best hahahahahhaa. i bet you have loads of fun withh that homieeeee!
save_me_08 0
I have the urge to do something like that every time I see a tour group. And I don't even know the guides...I just think the prospective students have the right to know this place sucks
Jeffo314 0
Well at least the weed is really cheap and you can still get some despite your recent unemployment.
0___0 9
:O #1 saying ~first~ like that actually wasn't annoying, more entertaining >_> HEY, It's 4/20 in eight days, your friend was just watching out for you and the people you were touring :D
maryann_massacre 0
"I agree, your life is f***ed (6510) - you deserved that one (420)" Hahahahaha. Hahahahaaa... Haha... Haaaa....
Kel0615 0
#17- Lol, seems like someone's a little bitter about their rejection from CCAC... Hopefully, you can explain that it wasn't really your fault. I mean, what else could you have done to prevent it?
jp11692 0
how the hell would that decide whether you have a job or not? it wasn't you who said it.
rachel_anna 0
hahaha 39 this FML made me laugh out loud.