Today, I was giving a tour on campus when one of my friends approached us and said, "Don't go here, the weed's too expensive." and walked away. Thinking he was coming back to say he's joking, he instead says, "Just kidding, it's really cheap." and walked off. I may or may not still have a job. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I arrived at the pizza place I work at to find that I'd been fired. Apparently, the class stoner came in last night and not only demanded a free pizza, but also claimed that I always gave him one. I've never talked to this kid in my life, but my boss still doesn't believe me. FML
Today, I was walking around my college campus when someone asked me if I'd gotten separated from my tour group. He didn't believe me when I said I was a student here. This happens all the time. FML
Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML
Today, after my close friend had his baby, he told me that he was no longer going to be selling weed at his house. I was happy for him, because it's unsafe. Until I found out he was still selling at my house with the help of my roommates, without telling me. FML
Today, I got fired for failing a drug test for weed. My boss is the one who sells me weed. FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML
Today, I was getting lunch at a fast food restaurant. My boss was in front of me, and in order to get on his good side I offered to pay. Instead, I got fired because I guess my boss assumed I was making fun of his salary, which I knew nothing about. FML
Today, my coworker paid me back the $15 I let him borrow and we shook hands. Later, I was called into my boss's office, where he threatened to fire me for doing a drug deal in front of customers. The police are getting involved. FML
Today, I left early from a trashy dance and bought a soda at a Shell station. The clerk asked me if I had been smoking weed. When I replied, "No", he said, "You mean you always look like that?" FML
Today, I went to a going away party for a coworker. I had brought weed for the party and at one point a guy asked me if I have a Grindr. I replied, "No, I don't use those dating apps. I do have a Fetlife but that's it, if you want it." He apparently meant a weed grinder. Most awkward 3 hours ever. FML
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Top comments
SpunkT 0
Yeah why would you be responsible for having an idiot friend? Also you could have just said something to the effect of "Don't mind him, he's an idiot" and pretend he's not your friend. And then later tell him not to bother you when you're working cause it's really rude.
24788 7
I do stupid things like this all the time to my friends. You need to lighten up and relax about it.
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Comments (91)
kt20 0
Anyone who thinks this is funny doesn't know what it's like to be a tour guide. I take my job VERY seriously, and I don't like it when my friends try to **** with me. Nevertheless, I doubt your boss will find out, right? And it's not like you can control your friends, though I would have a talk with him about what's appropiate...
4evanucks 0
look who's getting all Mr. Policeman on u!! hahaha..
xD4nny 0
I hope you don't work as a person who gives tours if you can't speak English well.
deliciouskaek 1
If that guy had said "Can I get some weed? Same as usual, dude.", that could have been a problem - he'd then have been implicating you. Otherwise, this is not FML-worthy, since you can't be held responsible for someone else being a dick.
lmao212 0
lol that is something me and my friends would do...but that sucks lol
tiltwrestler 0
This is why college is a joke. An establishment becomes an institution when the burden of proof is no longer on why you SHOULD attend, but rather on why you SHOULDN'T attend! Statistically, too many people attend college, for the number of white-collar jobs available for what the people are trying to get. There's too many people sitting at crappy jobs with their fancy diplomas. Not to mention the bad influence of drugs, as well as the high costs and wasted time, of college life. College has ceased to become a necessary enlightening, educational option for the few, and is now nothing more than a high-priced, drug-laden, babysitting option for the masses. Instead of college, we need harder programs in actual grade school, as well as career-specific training, and we also need more businessman and entrepreneurs to boost our economy- you know, people taking the initiative and getting things started. Sh*t isn't going to happen if many millions of people graduate college with degrees, and then they look around and there is relatively few spots for people to employ them! We need balance. The short version: college is a waste, and too many people attend it. It's overused and a drain on our economy, and is adding to the national deficit.
Sacho_fml 0
ahahahahahahah totally something that could happen at my campus xD
chrisapoo23 0
hahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahashahah
JoshBarblahblah 0
#17 I'm afraid that I have to disagree with you. College is still a great investment for people, as can be seen in the wage gaps between college educated individuals and everyone else. Career-specific training? You've got to be kidding. The purpose of public education is not to provide students with the gateway into a specific career, but rather to produce a generation of people capable of functioning in our society. Also, as the economy has become more global, job competition has become much greater. You need to have as many qualifications as possible in order to succeed.
puhffft 0
He/she could get fired for that. A girl on my hall was nearly fired from her job as a tour guide for something similar. It sucks, but it still happens.
thatoneguy1812 0
So... is it cheap?