By potassiumgirl /
Wednesday 11 April 2012 19:53 /
United States - Hollywood
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Top comments
By
Tweekz14
| 5
So I'm guessing you swallow?
By
nofearjenshere
| 12
It's a sin not to swallow, there are people starving in Africa.
Comments
By
haidere
| 3
Go buy a dildo or watch porn. Middle schoolers use bananas.
Reply
Sexual_predator
| 0
Well as long as she hs practice, she's good enough for me. (she also has to be under 14)
Reply
ninjaboy18
| 6
Your boyfriend should not be complaining. At least he gets some head. My girlfriend thinks it's nasty and does not want to do it. He should be thankful..
Reply
ninjaboy18
| 6
.
Reply
xcarxcrashx
| 9
33 Wtf is wrong with you? Where the hell are the mods?
Reply
alexup24
| 13
should middle schoolers really be practicing these techniques?
Reply
ghostlilac
| 25
K.
^ lame chem joke
Reply
Enslaved
| 36
Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator?
A: Why are you shaking? It's me she's going to eat!
Reply
SoSickWithIt
| 14
^ clever, clever! It took me three times to read that and get what it meant. I think my mind wanted to block off all perverted thoughts, but then again, vibrator was in the paragraph..
Reply
VeganVampyre
| 26
47- I guess I'm lame too then 'cause I thought that was pretty cute :P
Reply
EagorLuvsBigFoot
| 8
Haha even though the joke wasn't that funny I still thumbed it up anyways. Always looking out for a fellow comedian :)
Reply
The_DoritoNinja
| 4
I once told a chemistry joke....
....
There was no reaction
I'm going back to my box now.
Reply
ghostlilac
| 25
:) love youu guys
Reply
stalkerstatus101
| 5
Wait 47 i dont get it...
Reply
tellithowitis
| 13
One time I told a lame joke...
Everyone thought it was lame.
Heh heh heh...
Okay no
*crawls back into corner
Reply
effy19
| 7
2- who cares if practicing on food items is "for middle schoolers"? bananas are much yummier than rubber/glass toys!!
Reply
max_wilder
| 9
Chemistry jokes are periodically funny.
Reply
nofearjenshere
| 12
Sometimes you just have to make a lame chemistry joke because all the good ones argon.
Reply
ladyLALAA
| 28
If loving my kids is lame, I guess I'm just a big lame!
Reply
ShyAnn29
| 14
179, glass toys!? That just isn't right, what if it shattered?
Reply
TheHaHaNoGuy
| 5
The glass would be much too thick to shatter. Glass is a very strong material when it's not thin like in glasses and windows
Reply
p3mguin
| 7
What do we do with chemists when they die?
WE BARIUM
Reply
eon07
| 0
That's pretty funny lol
Reply
p3mguin
| 7
How do Chemists have fun in an amusement park?
THE FERROUS WHEEL
Reply
p3mguin
| 7
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They are cheaper than DAY RITES
I could go on all day
Reply
nofearjenshere
| 12
Why are chemistry jokes sodium funny??
Reply
AllThatHit
| 7
what do you say to the chemist who steals your gold ring? au get back here
Reply
muffinsx3
| 0
I don't use bananas?
Reply
AceArctic
| 4
So an electron walks into a bar and asks "How much?" the bartender replies "For you? No charge!"
Reply
BlueEyes9812
| 5
Omg it's thick and won't shatter unless u dropped it
Reply
xsarax_fml
| 10
The name is bond. Ionic bond. Taken, not shared.
Reply
jbuckets_404
| 31
#166: Suggest you go look at the periodic table....
Reply
jbuckets_404
| 31
#233: They're also "enhanced" during the mfg. process to be near-unbreakable....
By
Tweekz14
| 5
So I'm guessing you swallow?
Reply
nofearjenshere
| 12
It's a sin not to swallow, there are people starving in Africa.
Reply
Epiqness
| 0
I wish all girls had 28's mentality.
Reply
SkoomaKi
| 24
Slightly cold with a hint of meanness.
Reply
ASSASSIN95
| 16
Well at least your trying :)
Reply
xoconnie
| 8
lmao practice makes perfect..
Reply
MDTeddy
| 13
Swallowing is good for you. Just don't choke.
Reply
cc_the_beast
| 6
1-I do believe she inhales. Way more hardcore than swallowing...
Reply
hawkey126
| 0
Dafuq did I just read?
Reply
kayla_ann0o
| 9
Why is everyone saying she swallows? When you swallow does it go to your lungs? Hope not.
Reply
ProhibitionRose
| 14
80- it's called a joke.
Reply
kayla_ann0o
| 9
84-go figure?
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ContractedTyler
| 0
93-Go away please, cunt
Reply
skoob1
| 12
"swallow bitch, there's people starving in Africa... Single every single day, do it every single way, make the single ladies say oh Bo"~Bo burnham
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nuggetmonster
| 12
113, I love you.
Reply
The_Hitdude
| 12
kayla_annOo:
Do yourself a favor and shut the fuck up. Not only will you be doing yourself a favor, you will be doing all of us one aswell. Why? Because we won't have to waste or time watching your idiocy play out. Thanks in advance.
Reply
MrBrightside21
| 20
113 - "They can be Spanish, French, Swedish, or Cambodian, I'll slime you so hard, you could be on Nickelodeon." Bo Burnham is my idol.
Reply
ColCyclone
| 17
137- you must feel pretty bad ass trying to talk down to a girl on the Internet.
Reply
ThatCrazyRebel
| 2
137 - Watch out, we have a badass over here
Reply
KeannaLove
| 32
#137- Dude chill out. Don't get your panties in a bunch.
Reply
MDTeddy
| 13
It was wrong on so many l-l-levels.
Reply
strike2867
| 13
Why? I've came, you could gargle it for all I care, I'm going to sleep.
Reply
ClaremoreZebra
| 8
Picturing this girl, being suffocated, by a piece of molested banana has me quite amused.
Reply
dapheronixx03
| 6
i said the same thing:S
Reply
TiffTiffGirl
| 0
Lol nice meme
Reply
Calumae
| 8
More like inhaled it. ..
Reply
Downyyyy
| 0
28 is awesome.
Reply
nofearjenshere
| 12
^ why thank you.
Reply
GetDirtyDoWork
| 1
Hahaha
Reply
call4agoodtime
| 3
Spitters are quitters.
Reply
klrfish1968
| 0
Me to
Reply
adamo_erebus
| 25
that time of the month? :(
Reply
rinblack1612
| 10
Spitters are quitters!
By
suncifir
| 6
Lovely mental image if you think about it
Reply
UsernameHere234
| 13
I find it very easy to masturbate to as well. Unless that's not what you meant... ( ._.)
Reply
BehindU
| 5
FAP FAP FAP!!!
By
Give_Linux_A_Go
| 28
Well, that sucks.
Reply
kirstenthegreat
| 3
kind of blows if you ask me.
Reply
BehindU
| 5
Aw guys cum on no more clever puns.
Reply
coolstorybro6969
| 6
I don't think I could swallow one one more of these bad puns, they all blow
Reply
Mooish
| 18
But I like the clever puns, you guys all pleasure me with your hands!
Reply
MrBrightside21
| 20
It's a lot harder to cum up with a good pun than you think, Mooish.
Reply
Thepunspotter
| 3
I see what you did there
Reply
btnhdude
| 0
Punspotter spotted a spot of puns.
By
ClassyCommando
| 13
Dear God, imagine having to explain that to a doctor at a hospital...
Reply
Heinousness
| 0
... Or your boyfriend who is driving you to the hospital.
Reply
MaydayParadexx
| 18
My health teacher is a nurse, and she said one woman came in with a curling iron stuck in her vagina and said she fell on it......
Reply
br0ccoli
| 14
151- LOL
"I was just walking and then suddenly I fell and in the process my pants fell to my knees which caused my curling iron to stick straight up and I happened to land on it perfectly so much so that it penetrated me."
LOL.
By
SkoomaKi
| 24
I wish my girlfriend was that dedicated....
Reply
nick315
| 8
......I wish I had a .....girlfriend......
Reply
SoccerForTheWin
| 5
/ thinks he's cool cuz he uses /
Reply
tellithowitis
| 13
Forever a nose
Reply
prepayedtank
| 0
72 - forever alone guy has a friend!!
Reply
ycrem0n
| 20
I wish I had someone who knows I exist.
Reply
Heinousness
| 0
Forever wanting her to notice me.
By
DracoSpirita
| 21
I don't understand this FML... Mostly because where I live I am not exposed to things like sex, so I know next to nothing about it.
Reply
Shrike
| 22
Nice edit. How do you know it's sexual but not what a blowjob is?
Reply
DracoSpirita
| 21
I was told about oral sex in theology class last year but the class never went into details about sex.
Reply
zombicidal
| 11
she inserted the banana into her mouth then aspirated it
Reply
DracoSpirita
| 21
Okay, that makes more sense now. ^^'
Reply
berichsoon
| 11
There is your Theology class summary
Reply
downtime
| 12
7, What backwards place do you live in? Enjoy being the last generation I guess...:P
Reply
ReAnnMichelle
| 0
Dude that must suck. You never get to enjoy the pleasure of sex && you never get to have a baby!
Reply
coolstorybro6969
| 6
...if you didn't know she put in her mouth...what did they tell you about oral sex?
Reply
rubyliu8420
| 7
Where do u live, another planet?
Reply
Uramonkey
| 11
i'm 99.9999999% sure you are not from a public school. either that or you are the least curious person i have ever heard of. you post on fml yet you have never searched up sex.
Reply
Fml_FTW228
| 10
Either you're lying or stupid/unobservant. You say you live where you have not been exposed to, at least, sexual education in school. Also, you're 17... WTF?!? You don't know even what a blowjob is at 17?
Reply
mccaincracker
| 6
7 - you have Internet; you're doing it wrong!
Reply
eeppiicc
| 8
If what your little profile thing says is true, that you live in the USA then you must be blowing smoke out your ass. Of course you probably wouldn't understand that either because of where you live. But seriously you live in the US are 17 have the powers of FML and the internetz and you don't understand. I call BS
Tldr: #7 I call BS because you live in the USA and are 17
Reply
Awsumuzzie
| 12
Wtf 95, that's not all the pleasures of life. You're too young to give "funny advice" like that. Go enjoy being a kid while you can... Btw, anyone understand the mentality of girls when as soon as they have sex, apparently, they know all there is to know about it?
Reply
koolkat27
| 13
I could understand if you were homeschooled or just very devoutly religious, but really? You don't know what a blowjob is and you're 17? Sad life you live I guess.
Reply
DracoSpirita
| 21
I do go to a private catholic school, taught by nuns, and live an extremely restricted life because my parents are religious and won't let me go out with friends or date.
Reply
becka344
| 0
17? Riiiight.
Reply
Llama_Face89
| 33
95- you're...13... A child your age shouldn't be having sex and certainly not giving advice about it...
Reply
DracoSpirita
| 21
What is so wrong with the people of this world that it's hard for people to believe that someone can be innocent at the age of seventeen? I swear, people disgust me.
Reply
bizarre_ftw
| 21
By 17 many are (nearly) sexually mature and have passed through some of their horniest years, if you're completely innocent you either have a hormonal issue, you lack all form of curiosity, or you're psychologically damaged
Also, might I mention, curiosity is know to be one of tge most important things we humans have, it in a sense makes us human
Reply
DracoSpirita
| 21
After the hell that is my life, it's most likely that out of those options, I am psychologically damaged. I doubt it, however, seeing as all of my friends are just as innocent as I am.
Reply
downtime
| 12
291, Ignorance is nothing to be proud of. The sad thing is, you think people disgust you because of their ability to embrace humanity. There are plenty of things humans do that are disgusting, sex is not one of them.
Reply
DracoSpirita
| 21
I don't think sex is disgusting. I think the people who treat it like a worthless activity are. Sex is sacred, and people have it just to have it.
Reply
MackenzieLove
| 0
Well..you're just fantastic to say the least(=
Reply
downtime
| 12
That's an opinion. Not a fact.
You also assume people think it's a worthless activity.
Why don't you just make a few more assumptions while you're at it.
Reply
DracoSpirita
| 21
I was not making assumptions. I did not say that everyone treated it like a worthless activity. It just seems to me that, based on the comments of other FMLs, a lot of people on here think that. Sorry if you take offense to my opinion. Jeez.
Reply
downtime
| 12
Bitching because I think what you're saying is crap is not a valid argument. You can give your opinions, I don't have to agree with them, and I don't have to keep mine to myself.
Reply
_krystallynn_
| 11
at least theres one guy in the world who's whole life doesn't revolve around sex. and he's honest about it. unlike a lot of guys, who fuck anything they can get their penis in.
By
C94_
| 0
Well.... Yea fyl
By
girlwithmoodeyes
| 0
i dont like bananas.
Reply
dancinwookie
| 21
More of a taco lover?
Reply
girlwithmoodeyes
| 0
bawahahahahahha, no. :/
By
markrs
| 0
A banana can't give you advice though.
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