Today, I was called by a restricted number. The man on the phone then explained to me in detail what I was doing at every second that I was on the phone with him. I'm scared to leave my house. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Today, after months of job searching, I finally got a call about one of my applications. I wasn't able to answer it, but he left a voicemail. I've listened to it over and over, and I can't understand the contact information. He called from a restricted number. FML
Today, I had the cops called on me for acting suspiciously. I was using a payphone. FML
Spooky stuff
Today, I was playing with my phone after midnight, and I kept getting calls from a withheld number. The guy just breathed heavily and wouldn't speak. When the third call came, I asked, "Who the hell are you?" The call ended, and my dad yelled from outside my door, "ME! Now go to sleep!" FML
Today, I've been getting calls for over a week on my home phone, cell phone, and the work phone at my night shift, in which someone whispers terrifying Satanic-sounding chants at me. I've now found out that the caller is my best "friend". His explanation: "You seemed lonely, man." FML
This is fine
Today, my roommate told me there is some restricted number that keeps calling and waking her up at odd hours of the night. She then says she's getting the police involved to find out who it is because she feels "harassed". I'm the restricted caller calling to wake her up from snoring so loud. FML
Place in the world fades away
Today, I received a random phone call from an unknown number. Three times. After the third time, the person started yelling at me viciously. Then I suddenly heard a different voice, saying, "Terribly sorry, sir. My poor sister has dementia and thinks you're her husband. Her dead husband, I might add." FML
Tracking
Today, I discovered a tracking app enabled on my phone so I switched it off to save battery space. Within 20 minutes my mother rang and demanded to know where I was, what I was doing, if I was with some woman… you get the picture. I'm 32 and own my own apartment. FML
Today, while at work, I had to spend an hour and a half on the phone, listening to an old lady relive her entire day in excruciating detail. We're not allowed to hang up on customers, and she was extremely quick to dismiss all my attempts to steer the call back on topic. FML
Today, I got a stern talking-to from the police about threatening and harassing people. Who had called them? None other than my stalker, whom I'd just informed about the restraining order I was filing against him after finding him in my house. For the second time. FML
This isn't relevant to my interests
Today, I wanted to call my mom to ask for advice but called my boss instead. I panicked and ended up talking about weekend plans like nothing was wrong. She now knows way too much about my personal life. FML
Top comments
babyyninjas 1
he knows what you did last summer !
ohhhsnapple 14
Have you checked the children? O_o
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Comments (320)
hateevryone 15
call the police. you're being stalked
3ph600v 15
Well if they can see you when you're in your house, wouldn't it be safer to go out? But seriously get some help.
acceptyourfate 8
Write an FML about it instead of calling the cops ... Yeah, that's what I'd do...
MyS3lf 24
You should report that. That's not a funny joke at all. You should probably arm yourself as well.
chquitaMa 0
Wtf !
darkmis1 18
Call the cops and have them trace it.
RedPillSucks 33
He know if you are sleeping. He know when you're awake. He knows that you've been a very bad girl and he ain't no f*cking Santa!!!
Delta2Almanac 7
You're just secretly a C.I.A agent ;)
s1d1ouz 2
Go hide in the shitter!
RedPillSucks 33
Yeah. They'll never look there. However, the shelter might smell nicer.
ACandelaria_209 1
Call the police!