Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got sick of my flatmate stealing my food so I decided to sabotage a leftover pizza with laxatives. I came back home later in the evening after a night of heavy drinking. Guess what I had to eat in my drunken stupor. FML
Today, I tried hallucinogenic mushrooms for the first time with my friend. Little did I know, they last for around 6 hours, and I had class at 3, when I had to give a presentation in front of 30 people. FML
Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML
Today, I went to a Halloween party with people from work. As the night passed, my boss got hammered and started throwing food at people. It was fun and games until I accidentally spilled his tenth beer. His response? To slam a hollowed out pumpkin full of chocolate mousse over my head. FML
Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML
Today, I found some oversized-strawberry-spree candies in my pantry. They were delicious and I munched on them through out the day. I ended up in and out, but mostly in, the bathroom in the dead hours of the night experiencing the wonders and effectiveness of Fruit Flavored Fiber pills. FML
Today, I went to a party dressed as a Pinata. Drunk people tried to hit me all night. FML
Today, I drank half a bottle of tequila and had an edible within 30 minutes. I couldn't remember a thing until this morning when my roommates told me I pissed myself on the couch, projectile vomited in the living room, and went on to fondle my roommates, who also had to help me shower. I have a designated seat on the couch now. FML
Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML
Today, I got food poisoning from a restaurant that I had chosen for our company party. Everyone who went blamed me for their predicament. I also had to run to the toilet every ten minutes while they were all mad at me. FML
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Top comments
katgurl 13
LOL imagine actually watching this guy after that.. and drunk ? haha
capthavoc123 0
I don't pretend to be an expert on the culinary arts, but why would you eat a bowl of ANY kind of mushrooms by themself? There wasn't anything else to eat at a friggin' party?
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Comments (175)
pokypunk 0
Not to be a critic, but doesn't drinking lessen your shroom high? Shrooms work off your brain cells and alcohol kills your brain cells. a couple shots of liquor probably would have helped you I think.
pokypunk 0
raetard? :)
pokypunk 0
Oh oh and one more thing... SHROOMS DO NOT MAKE YOU HALLUCINATE. fer serious! If you want to hallucinate like you do on shrooms just play guitar hero for about an hour then stare at a white wall.. looks the same.. It's the emotional trip not the mind trip that gets you.
DameGreyWulf 1
Actually, they do. Friend of mine's brother does shrooms. He has little hallucinations all the time. Mostly he says everything just looks cartoony though.
caamm 0
too bad there wasnt a bowl of pills you mistook for those little candy lollies. woulda been the best night ya ever had
onyxindigo 0
#50, they mean that it's not new at all, people have thought that for years.
iKaite 0
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AcdcKicksAss 3
Sounds like an amazing party to me; OP, I am jealous.
kisseshugsdrugs 5
shrooms dont last twelve hours no matter how much you take. seven or eight at the most. and for all those saying "shrooms look like regular mushrooms" no they dont. they look dried up and like wrinkled leather like some other poster said before. and they always taste like shit. unless they were mixed into something idk how you couldnt know they were shrooms OP. but this reallyyyyyy isnt an fml. i wouldve left and went on an adventure hahaha some of us are killing to get some hallucinagenics
highsheep 0
for al the people that said YDI for taking drugs, you're stupid, he didn't know what it was and shrooms are awesome.
enough4 0
Hmm, let's see. An inadvertent psilocybin overdose can often leave you with a terrible "the world is falling apart and I'm doing everything I can to stop it" feeling. Mushrooms more often affect your mood and inner perception rather than strictly make you see things that aren't there, so at least this isn't someone pretending to know what shrooms do to you. However, no one, and I mean NO ONE would just randomly leave a bowl of shrooms at a party for people to munch on. A "bowl" of shrooms would cost over $100. Even if it was sprinkled in with the Chex mix, that's still not something people do. This isn't the same as spiking the punch, shrooms are expensive and take a while to grow, so they're hard to come by. You could probably get a person to buy a single cap for $5-10 and you're just dumping them in a public bowl at a party? Hell no. Furthermore, shrooms don't look like snacks or taste good enough for anyone to bother eating, let alone eat enough to accidentally overdose. They look, feel and taste more like something you'd get on your jacket if you rolled around in a field, especially with the "shake," rather than the mushrooms you put on a pizza. I call shenanigans on this, except I'm guessing a true story was embellished rather than made up entirely. Probably took a bad first encounter with shrooms and changed the beginning to make it FML worthy.
kaztor 0
Lol... Well on the other side, some people are cool, and or grow their own.. Maybe a bunch of people threw in money for the shrooms. And also I've tasted imported chocolate that had psilocybin in it that was ******* delicious, and was better then anything I had ever picked fresh --- sooooo..
KapiTezuka 0
About putting out a bowl: Friends of mine have done that at several of their parties, you can just go into the mountains in fall and collect them here. Maybe they grow where OP lives as well, or the people having the party were growing their own which isn't that hard or expensive either. So this could very well be a true story. Apart from this, I fully agree with what you said.
DameGreyWulf 1
I think that's what he meant when he mentioned the part about selling them for lots of money. Meaning, if you grow your own, the smarter and more logical thing to do is to sell them, not leave them in snack bowls for people to munch on. Especially for people to eat by themselves.
enough4 0
I just find it very hard to believe that people throw parties these days in which they put a bowl of $100+ worth of illegal drugs on the table and expect people to treat it like finger food. Again, this isn't spiking the punch or leaving a few bottles of liquor around. Mushrooms are rare and expensive, and this is just not how you treat this kind of material. I mean, personally, if I figure out what's in that bowl, I'm stuffing some or most of that shit in my jacket pocket. At the very least I'm gonna take as much as I want, like a fat guy eating hors d'oeuvres. If the host doesn't like it, it's his responsibility to tell his guests how to behave around his free drugs, even a quick "go easy on the shroom bowl please" should be enough (and OP's host apparently didn't even feel the need to mention it, eh). I stand by my assessment that OP had his first shroom trip, it went badly, and he made the beginning of the story more interesting so he could get it on FML. Or maybe this is just how things go down in Sweden.