Sobering

By Anonymous - 23/02/2022 02:59

Today, I drank half a bottle of tequila and had an edible within 30 minutes. I couldn't remember a thing until this morning when my roommates told me I pissed myself on the couch, projectile vomited in the living room, and went on to fondle my roommates, who also had to help me shower. I have a designated seat on the couch now. FML
I agree, your life sucks 179
You deserved it 1 802

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Didn’t anyone ever tell you to pace yourself with this stuff?

Is that the spot that's the best spot for the breeze and at the perfect viewing angle of the TV? And marked with a huge piss stain?

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Didn’t anyone ever tell you to pace yourself with this stuff?

Is that the spot that's the best spot for the breeze and at the perfect viewing angle of the TV? And marked with a huge piss stain?

Makes me wonder what the hell you were thinking

I don't think there was much "thinking" involved.

Missing details from this story: You're 28, You're an Ivy League graduate, This happens every Friday, Your roommates think you're so pathetic they make you sit on the couch like a kid on the naughty step instead of kicking you out for what is essentially sexual assault and property damage.

Anything that starts with someone drinking themselves into oblivion and getting high is an automatic YDI. Maybe bring your consumption down a few notches so you don't puke and pee all over the place and to avoid sexually assaulting a roommate.