Today, I walked to Starbucks. On the way a homeless guy asked me for change and I lied and said I had no money. On my way back, Strawberry Frappuccino in hand, the same guy recognized me. He followed me for 3 blocks, swearing and yelling at me. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while getting out of Starbucks there was a homeless guy. I bought him a coffee and he was so happy he gave me a hug. Guess whose wallet is missing? FML
Today, a man came up to me and asked for a $50 bill in change. Being a good man, I said sure. I gave him the change and he gave me the $50 bill. After walking into Starbucks to buy a coffee, I handed the cashier my $50 bill. She called the cops. It was counterfeit. FML
Today, I saw an elderly man struggling to make it across a busy street. I jumped up from my table at Starbucks to help him, leaving my things behind. When I got back to my table feeling good, I found that my coffee had disappeared. So had my wallet. FML
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him that I had none, he yelled angrily, "Who comes to this city without money?" I replied, "Apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
Today, while I was walking home, a homeless man saw me and didn't ask for change, but how much I charged. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, my friend and I walked 3 miles to a Starbucks. We went inside, paid for our coffees and walked the 3 miles back to my house. We forgot to pick up our coffees. FML
Today, I was walking down the street when a homeless man asked me for some spare change. I told him I didn't have any. I then tripped. Not only spilling the soda I was drinking all over myself, but also spilling the spare change I had from buying it. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
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Top comments
itsnotfair 0
you're not obliged to give your money to a bum anyway!
Outpail 1
Haha. This happened to me once, just keep on walking and drop a couple of quarters to keep him occupied while you make an escape.
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Comments (477)
missethics 0
**** that shit, he would have spent on liquor anyway. If he wants money he can get a damn job.
etanico 0
I'd say you deserved it, but he'd probably just spend it on crack...
TUnitDaMonster 0
Hahaha u got stalked by Goodtime Charlie
Lady_Luck 0
That would be the time where you told him you paid with a Credit Card or something x3
bosoxrule55 0
Why are people saying YDI, theyre bums for a reason, cuz theyre too ****** lazy to apply themselves so they deserve what they have, FYL
thuryn 2
jasmine1259: Hey, it's not my fault if you can't spell or write. Maybe you should take an English class. It'll make it easier for people to understand you the first time. You'll find that you have to say, "Well, you KNOW what I mean!" a whole lot less. Don't fight it. It's good for you. Oh, and about homeless people spending the money on drugs/booze? It's NOT just a stereotype. I live in a town of around 100,000 people (not that big). Every one of the homeless people I have seen here is like that. Every. Single. One. There are five or so that hang around downtown. I've WATCHED them beg a few bucks, and then stroll right over to the liquor store RIGHT AFTER claiming it was for food. Same goes for the beggars at the highway off ramps. "Stranded please help" my ass. Ever wonder why they're never there at night? Because they walk to their PERFECTLY WORKING CAR and drive off. I've seen it many times. Don't give them money. If you want to help people, seek out people who want help. Volunteer at a shelter or a charity. Offer one of those bums a job (and see what happens). Giving people money is not the same as helping them, just like a check is not the same as a gift.
iampjman 0
That was so mean of you!
justlooking 0
Just say, "I only have a credit card." they'll leave you alone.
xoxkarinexox 0
awwwww poor homeless man
xoxkarinexox 0
holy shit (<---- sorry) but #183 i ******* love you(: way to tell them! :D