Today, I walked into the laundry room when my mom pulled a condom wrapper out of my pants pocket. She looked at me and said, "You know you can't wash and reuse these?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my father pulled me aside as I was heading off to my girlfriend's house. He said, "Next time you have sex, don't leave the tied up condom in its wrapper inside your shorts pocket, otherwise your mother might find it again as she's folding laundry." FML
Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML
Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said, "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML
Today, my mum cleaned my room. When I got home she yelled at me for having condoms. I'm 24 years old and in a long term relationship. FML
Today, my mother had "The talk" with me about sex. I spent the entire time confused as to what brought this up, until she mentioned she had found a used condom in the backseat of the car. I haven't had any action in it, and have no idea whose it was. FML
Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML
Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML
Today, my mom was snooping around my room, and found the unopened box of glow in the dark condoms I bought myself year ago. She laughed and said, "No takers yet, eh?" FML
Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML
Today, after sex with my girlfriend, I thought it would be sexy to wear her underwear until we saw each other again. I found a pair in her bathroom, but they definitely weren't her sexy ones. Her mom walked in on me to collect the laundry and screeched, "What are you doing with my panties!" FML
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Top comments
Death_From_Above 0
nice try guy. but she's right
vinzk_fml 6
haha your mom is awesome.
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Comments (170)
jess6blondie9 3
Your mom seems pretty chill.
DocBastard 40
Nice try, OP. I know you're trying to act all studly like you've been out whoring around and scoring with numerous women. We all know you were just using the condom while jerking off to your favourite Justin Bieber videos.
morgan320 0
shes pretty hot though.
kittykat1497 7
a bit too flat for my taste though :P
mattmadden 0
#32, You just made my day.
lets_be_ian 5
Actually considering the rate at which new environmentally friendly products are becoming kosher this may not be a bad area to get into if you start early. A nice conversation piece as well. "What is it you do again?" "Well, as a matter of fact I am at the very head of the used condom recycling game!"
ImInABox 6
I see what you did there.
jess6blondie9 3
Just give up now..
jazbeth94 0
haha that,s a cool mom
AnagenisisZagus 13
Well, she's not wrong, man.
reece97rox 0
was she serious?
Inspired22 11
Your mom is hilarious! Her comment would have made my day!
janix_fml 0
why cant you?? i know that its a gross idea.. but you woulda thought that all the enviromentally friendly people woulda thought of that by now . . .
Deadzombie 2
dumb.
toxicmurder109 4
ur mom didn't seem to care