Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Don't answer
Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML
Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML
Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML
Thanks dad…
Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML
Gassy
Today, my friend was confiding all her problems to me over Skype. I pressed the mute button so I could let out a fart, forgetting I'd already muted it earlier. I broke several minutes of my own silence with a devastating wet one. Now she won't talk to me. FML
Blame the pooch
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML
Close quarters
Today, I had to shit really bad while I was in bed with my girlfriend. Luckily she was sleeping. I didn’t want to be obvious, so I closed all the doors, crept into the bathroom and sat on the toilet. I accidentally let out the loudest fart. I got a text saying, “Walls are thin, you good?” FML
Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML
Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Top comments
TheDrifter 24
I hate when that happens. At least when I'm doing it on purpose I can fart a catchy tune.
SkyDog 9
I thought that was "shitty situation".
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Comments (82)
maggiefox 25
If I was the one that got that call, I'd laugh forever
anxious_penguin 2
LO ******* L
ihelent 10
Why was your pants still on while sitting on a toilet ?
littleredgem 1
How does that even happen?!
focenspeil 7
The problem being what....?
cchan034 23
I got a regular charger last year because i always tell my parents "my phones almost out of battery" every time they called
Aurora25 29
How can you butt dial when your on a toilet...
GothicKnife 11
That's so nasty.
mb2_native 15
My woman would never let me hear the end of it haha
WeskersSexslave 15
I would laugh and tell you as a girlfriend thar your butthole left me a message roflmao!!! farts are funny and she will probably laugh