Today, I told my husband how frisky I was feeling, and asked him what he was going to do about it. He reached into our fruit bowl, tossed me a banana and told me to work it out, then returned to his video game. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML
Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said, "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML
Today, I was so sexually frustrated that I tried getting off with a banana. It was not enjoyable, for me or the banana. FML
Today, after confronting my husband about lack of intimacy in our marriage, I found him playing with himself. His response to my shock was, "This is less work and less involving." FML
Today, my husband decided he'd rather jerk off to the Wii Fit trainer than have sex with me. FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
Today, I told my husband I was horny and wanted to get it on. He agreed but first he had to finish the chapter he was reading, watch his show on Netflix, argue with strangers on Facebook, then do his workout. He had the nerve to cop an attitude when I was no longer in the mood. FML
Today, I was feeling frisky and my boyfriend was playing a video game in the living room. I started dancing in front of the T.V. with only my panties on, to which he responded, "You're every gamer's nightmare." FML
Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
stretchedthin 20
haha sorry but that is funny and sad though, sorry op. Maybe you should do the same thing to him when he asks for some give him some lotion.
eternal_malaise 10
Tell him you're thinking about finding a new joystick since his doesn't seem to be working anymore.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (196)
cryssycakesx3 23
if this were the other way around, the husband wanting sex, everyone would say "OMG that's not what a marriage is about, you don't have to have sex if you don't want to, tell him to suck it up, sex isn't most important. "
itsjusttofunny 8
maybe banging you got boring for him? I mean, you do seem kinda boring.
speakersboom 19
you sir, are an asshole.
krista17 11
Sit right next to him and start pleasuring yourself. He'll notice.
ChristianH39 30
Two words: titanfall beta
KingreX32 21
WOAH THATS OUT NOW. Is it out for ps3. must download.
ChristianH39 30
Not sure about ps3, but i have it on the Xbox one and it's beyond good
WhatsOpTic 11
Titanfall isn't coming to PlayStation
junkman6 22
Sexual equality, still the biggest farce since the de la Hoya v Trinidad decision.
williamcarter93 13
So what? He does not have to have sex when you want him to. If he was not in the mood he was not in the mood. And for all those saying stuff like 'she comes first' or 'he should fulfill his duties' I can bet if the script was switched you'd be all up in arms about a man being pissed that his wife won't have sex with him. OP< he doesn't want to do it now, try again some other time
gracehi 33
True, but it's still disappointing when you want to have sex with an actual human being and can't, no? Also, he could have just said, "I'm sorry, honey, but I'm just not up to it right now. Maybe later," instead of being an immature ass about it. And, there's been an increasing problem in recent years of men becoming addicted to video games and ignoring their real friends and family. This problem has been exacerbated by the fact that society won't acknowledge the severity of the problem, given that video games aren't deadly or physically addictive, and thus there are virtually no treatments for the problem, so people suffering from video game addiction don't get help. Women in relationships with these men are often neglected, sexually and emotionally. With the dismissive and disrespectful way he treated his wife (not just because he turned her down for sex) I'd say there's a good chance OP's husband is a video game addict. In which case, FHL.
GuiLD15 7
his point still stands. ._.
gracehi 33
My point is that it sounds like this may be much more serious than OP's husband simply not being "in the mood." He was disrespectful to his wife and dismissive of her needs, which alone indicates a deeper problem in their marriage. And if what I suspect is correct and OP's husband is indeed a video game addict, then he is almost never "in the mood," and when he is, the sex is entirely unsatisfying for his wife, because he wants to finish as quickly as possible to get back to his video games. It also means that he completely neglects his wife in every other way possible, and that their marriage is doomed to fail unless he gets over his addiction.
gracehi 33
So no, it's not a "so what?" situation. Whether or not he's addicted to video games, he was still disrespectful to his wife, not because he turned her down for sex, but because of the way he did it. That's not okay. And if he is addicted to video games, then the situation is much, much worse.
Aky0n 10
calm your **** you don't know the situation so stop assuming everything.
gracehi 33
I didn't assume anything, except that OP isn't a liar. OP's husband was a dick to his wife. That's a fact, assuming the FML is truthful. That's unacceptable. And he MIGHT be addicted to video games, which is a serious problem. I never made any definitive statements regarding that.
xzaj3 3
You dont interupt a mans game
gracehi 33
What if there's a fire? ... In my pants?
sexiilittlething 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Oh no, honey, I would make a huge deal about this. I would let him know that I think it's sexy and awesome when he plays video games, but if he can't take care of MY needs he gotta go
Devout1044 7
You totally failed there you tried to be funny or something but it didn't work.
Moobacca 2
God forbid a guy not be in the mood. It's not like women turn down men all the time or anything.
GuiLD15 7
I really wonder what would happen if you were a man. I doubt youd get a quality spouse. but hey. this day and age..
NostalgiaFreak9 43
So you would dump a man if he turned down one act of sex to fulfill your needs? Good luck being single for the rest of your life.
finch01 18
he sounds fruity to me
Devout1044 7
Hey I mean FYL but really you should of just pleasures yourself then if he asked for sex throw him the lotion and tissues then play his videogames