Today, I threw a bonfire for my birthday. My boyfriend managed to set my leg on fire by throwing his liquor bottle into the fire. Happy birthday to me. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I turned 21. It's also the day I learned how it feels to have my foot and leg set on fire by a drunken idiot who thought it was a great idea to splash lighter fluid into an open-pit bonfire. FML
Today, at a candlelit dinner, I accidentally set my dad's leg on fire. FML
Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML
Today, I celebrated my friend's birthday. While everyone was completely wasted, a couple of friends suggested that I throw a pie in the birthday boy's face. Only seconds after doing so did I realize that the centre of the pie had still been burning hot when he screamed in agony. FML
Today, I yelled at my boyfriend for smoking in the house, because I didn't want the house to smell like smoke. While doing so, I knocked over a candle and lit the couch on fire. FML
Today, I was sitting next to my friend as he blew out the candles on his birthday cake. Some asshole got the bright idea to shove his face in the cake, but they missed and pushed me in instead. The candles were still lit. My hair caught fire. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My children decided to make me "breakfast in bed", only to end up setting the kitchen on fire. FML
Today, it was my 21st birthday. I had a simple party with my boyfriend, with just a cake and a bottle of red wine. My boyfriend managed to get so drunk that he danced naked for 10 minutes, then told me I'm hideously obese but that he loves me anyway. FML
Today, it's my 20th birthday! Happy birthday to me! My boyfriend threw a beer can through my back wind-shield after breaking up with me. FML
Today, I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. As a joke, my friend and I served him non-alcoholic beer to see how he'd react. After a while, he faked being drunk, using it as an excuse after I caught him making out with one of my so-called "friends". FML
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Top comments
keiNan_fml 35
This girl is on fire.
kingdutchhy 19
I guess you could say that your birthday celebrations went up in flames.
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Comments (40)
Batkid217 14
that sounds like one fiery birthday !
nana_star 27
At least you can say that you looked smoking hot on your birthday. Happy birthday!
pyrexicpoet 18
Hopefully it didn't go up to your crotch or else your nickname would be fire crotch the rest of your life
leogachi 15
Making fun of someone for being set on fire isn't cool.
laden_swallow09 35
No duh, it's not cool. It's the very antithesis of cool. It's sssssssmokin'!
sturschaedel 27
Your boyfriend made you all hot and bothered! Sorry your birthday ended with you hurt though.
FrostyNipz19 12
Well now your the hottest person at the party
chuka81 27
You know what they say, if you're burned on your birthday, you'd become a dragon. Happy Birthday Mother of Dragons.
Zarcissa 34
Be happy that your hair wasnt burned. Still must've hurt. I hope my bday doesnt end like yours, which is today (06/09)
dilara_xo 12
happy b'day!
ColonelCusswords 24
Thats one hot birthday right there wish i coulda been there
SkullsRules1 26
I'm going to a bonfire on Saturday... thanks for the danger warnings
immunetoinsanity 23
I would dump his dumb ass... No telling what could happen in the future if he was this careless around you now.
leogachi 15
He could have been drunk. Drunk people tend to be careless anyway.