Today, I thought it would be funny to tickle my daughter's foot, which she hates. One bloody nose, multiple scratches and 4 toe-shaped bruises later, she's the one laughing. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML
Today, after being fed up with my sarcastic, mouthy daughter, I decided to remove her TV from her room. I dropped it on my foot and broke two toes. She promptly said, "That's what you get." FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML
Today, I did my old "toe-touch" cheerleading move to try to impress my 5-year-old daughter. When I landed, I broke my toe. FML
Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML
Today, my 4 year-old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML
Today, my six-month-old daughter decided to explore my nose, and before I could stop her she shoved her thumb deep in there. She thought it was hilarious when blood started gushing down my shirt. My nose is agony to touch and I still had to clean her up first. FML
Today, I discovered my boyfriend is incredibly ticklish on the bottom of his feet. Trying to be a bit flirty, I slowly slid two fingers down his calf and mockingly tickled his feet. He reacted by inadvertently elbowing me in the nose, nearly breaking it. FML
Today, instead of kissing my child's boo-boo on her finger to make it feel better, I accidentally headbutted her. FML
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Top comments
1O 0
This one all on you OP lol. if your son said he hated getting kicked in the balls would you still do it?
sammi955 0
ydi. if you know she hates it why do it?
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Comments (112)
capnbzarr 43
I've edited your FML for brevity: "Today, karma is still a bitch. FML."
mjeter86 3
serves u right, dumbass!
KickItHigh 32
u talking about
Grimmerie 31
considering to tickle me, you have to jab my ribs hard enough to leave bruises, it's an okay comparison in my opinion. people still thinks it's funny, even after one of my ribs gets cracked and i still can't stop laughing >.>
Jobbles 0
Hah, well deserved. I despise being tickled.
netherflame 0
#94 That's why I hate people from the South. They have absolutely no respect for how other feel about their dialects.
cheer4ever96 8
you deserve it.
missnoel 0
#52 for the win!
Mitch_Connor 11
You fail as a parent if you seriously let that go unpunished. Even if it's somewhat your fault...
Rainbow_dumpster 28
I can't belive the stupidity of this FML.... The minute I read, "Today I thought it would be funny..." it was an auto YDI. Op, you're an asswipe.