Health: Today, I thought it would be funny to jump in the pool while...

By princev - 18/06/2011 10:32 - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to jump in the pool while holding my cat. I am currently in the hospital due to the severe cuts on my face and throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 589

You deserved it 112 845

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Same thing different taste

By N1ch0la1 - 08/08/2009 09:35 - South Africa

Today, while in the shower, my roomates thought it would be really funny if they threw my cat in with me. The doctor who gave me the stitches also thought so. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 204

You deserved it 2 974

By ouch - 26/03/2011 02:27

Today, my cat fell into the bathtub while walking along the rim. This wouldn't have been so bad if I wasn't in it at the time, and if my skin was immune to being sliced open by a frantic kitty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 213

You deserved it 5 449

Poor little guy

By anonymous - 16/09/2022 02:30 - United States - Maryville

Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw my cat in the bathtub while I was in it. I had to go to the emergency room to get my penis stitched up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 335

You deserved it 116

By HHIChica - 17/09/2009 11:14 - United States

Today, while my 18 pound cat was on the edge of the tub watching me shower, he fell in. Apparently, in his mind, the best way to get away from the water is to climb my bare legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 419

You deserved it 5 837

Rescue cat

By crazycatlady - 04/02/2017 20:00 - United States - Charlotte

Today, my cat fell into the toilet, and I had to save him. I now have a soggy cat and scratched arms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 419

You deserved it 837

By murphy22 - 24/08/2012 09:33 - United States - Norman

Today, I was taking a relaxing bath. My cat decided to sit on the ledge, which is normal for her, but today she fell in. I never knew how painful it was to be scratched down there until today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 644

You deserved it 2 823

By Anonymous - 28/12/2018 06:00 - United States - Pittsford

Today, my cat jumped on my shoulders, but stepped in my hood and choked me and when I panicked she dug her claws into my shoulders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 144

You deserved it 495

By poolfail - 06/08/2014 21:14

Today, at the pool, I decided to face my fears and go off the high dive. I slipped off the edge and did a barrel roll into the pool while screaming like a little girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 092

You deserved it 6 543

By Travellingluck - 20/10/2017 16:12

Today, after a week of severe gastroenteritis that required a hospital stay, I was finally feeling well enough to go in the pool at our holiday resort. My fiance slipped on the edge of the pool and we're back in the hospital. Happy vacation! FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 711

You deserved it 264

Relax

By lyssthemiss - 22/09/2015 10:51 - United States - Joliet

Today, I was taking a bath after a long day at work. I closed my eyes and listened to music. My cat thought this was the perfect time to come out of his hiding spot and jump in the bath. Once he realized it was filled with water, he freaked out and dug his claws into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 787

You deserved it 2 312

Aaraeus 4

Saturday 18 June 2011 19:45

Catastrophic.

floiedy 0

Saturday 18 June 2011 19:47

You're an ass.

Comments

taetay2010j 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 7:28

ur stupid YDI

missy1228 2

Sunday 19 June 2011 7:33

well know you kitties will **** your shit up

MallyG_bitch 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 7:52

Hahahahahahaha that's funny, and you're dumb.

shocka_fml 4

Sunday 19 June 2011 7:57

you're retarded. like the dumbest ************ that ever lived

shocka_fml 4

Sunday 19 June 2011 7:59

you're retarded. like the dumbest ************ that ever lived

iJasper 8

Sunday 19 June 2011 8:03

YDI I mean Really? What the Hell where you thinking!

BilltheCatACK 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 8:17

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! I'm sorry you got hurt but that was some funny shite!

samicna 4

Sunday 19 June 2011 8:49

guess kitty is laughing now! you do realize there are laws protecting kitties?

michelleissexy 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 9:32

You SO DESERVED it I can't even explain how much you DESERVED it.

BadAssDerbyGirl 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 9:33

YOU COULD HAVE DROWNED YOUR POOR CAT YOU ************!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >:'O

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Today, I was spooning with my wife when I said, "It's cold tonight." Previously when I used that line, my wife would respond by saying, "I know how to warm you up" and we would make love. Tonight, she said, "I know how to warm you up" and farted on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 138

You deserved it 9 497

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 303

You deserved it 13 467

The Top

Today, I learned that dirty talk does NOT get me off. My boyfriend and I were having sex and I said, "I'm going to come" during the beginning of my orgasm. My orgasm immediately stopped right after I said that. I'd managed to turn myself off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 341

You deserved it 15 973

Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 014

You deserved it 601

Today, at breakfast, my sister labelled me a "feminist." My whole family now refuses to talk to me for more than 30 seconds, and acts as though I have an incurable, highly contagious disease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 925

You deserved it 5 478

Today, I decided to finally use the gym membership I got a few weeks ago. After I returned to the locker room, the locker I used was opened with all my stuff, including my iTouch, cell phone, and my wallet with cash stolen. It turns out I left the sticker that tells you your combo on my new lock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 954

You deserved it 76 253

Today, my girlfriend said she wanted to get a little crazy and try some role-play. "Act like you don't want it," she said. Without thinking, I replied, "Well, that should be easy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 473

You deserved it 54 652

Today, on our way to a comic book convention, I was getting in the car in my costume when my girlfriend fell against the car door, slamming it shut on my knight helmet, which broke the hinge. We couldn’t fix it, meaning it was stuck on my head for an hour while my dad drove over with an angle grinder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 426

You deserved it 145

Same thing different taste

Poor little guy

Rescue cat

Relax

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