Sex and Intimacy: Easy

Easy

By FootinMouth - 18/07/2013 21:48 - United States - Louisville

Today, my girlfriend said she wanted to get a little crazy and try some role-play. "Act like you don't want it," she said. Without thinking, I replied, "Well, that should be easy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 482

You deserved it 54 675

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/08/2013 20:01 - Portugal

Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 129

You deserved it 9 200

By jigglypluff - 19/11/2014 05:27 - United States - Omaha

Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 283

You deserved it 4 944

Going too far

By cad515 - 07/07/2021 02:01

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try role play. She suggested I be a robber, so I went outside and tried to break in my window, wearing nothing but my underwear and a ski mask on. She decided it would be funny to call the cops, because it would, "add to the mood." They came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 610

You deserved it 455

Make believe

By somebodyelse - 17/08/2009 05:13 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 879

You deserved it 5 514

Get it on

By xomelodygervais - 08/11/2013 14:00 - Canada - Timmins

Today, my husband's version of roleplaying was pretending that he actually wanted to have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 987

You deserved it 6 188

By Anonymous - 16/08/2015 15:49

Today, my girlfriend told me she wants to have sex with my ass. I'm not sure she's taking "no" for an answer, seeing as how she's keeping a dildo on her nightstand and is clearly waiting for me to fall asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 940

You deserved it 3 571

By Anonymous - 17/08/2018 03:30

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking up sexy clothes for me to wear while role-playing. I saw something I liked and asked him if we should get it. When he saw the model wearing it in the picture, he asked "Does it come with the girl?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 389

You deserved it 750

Nun the wiser

By Anonymous - 11/07/2021 16:01

Today, my girlfriend offered to roleplay as a sexy nun, then dumped me, claiming my saying yes meant I was attacking her catholic faith and that I’m a sick, depraved criminal. She was the one who offered. I’m not remotely interested in roleplay, I only agreed cause I thought it was her kink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 703

You deserved it 134

I can't help it

By Anonymous - 14/02/2015 17:47 - Ireland

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 238

You deserved it 11 935

Sounds hot

By oops999 - 19/11/2013 19:46 - United States - Downingtown

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 019

You deserved it 9 490

flockz 19

Friday 19 July 2013 8:03

it's a trap!

tehman117 21

Friday 19 July 2013 8:05

I NEEEEED IT!!!!!

Comments

Visibledeath52 4

Friday 19 July 2013 8:03

One does not simply make a bad first comment

flockz 19

Friday 19 July 2013 8:03

it's a trap!

dramaelf 37

Friday 19 July 2013 8:21

Admiral Ackbar?

subwaysurfers 13

Friday 19 July 2013 8:57

Why would she even want him to do that? It's like a rape scene.

ForwardUn2Dawn 18

Friday 19 July 2013 9:07

Focus all fire!

Enslaved 36

Friday 19 July 2013 9:35

28, maybe she wanted to take charge and seduce him?

Sir_ND_Pity 35

Friday 19 July 2013 11:37

2 - It was a trap of the most sinister kind, One that could confuse OP's weak mind! The only good side that I can see— Oh wait, there is none. FYL, OP! At least she didn't threaten you with a cleaver And tried to make you play Justin Beiber! One day, you'll have a chance to surpass This performance that made you sound like an ass. Until then, enjoy the rhymes of this poem. Too early to think, so poem rhymes with poem. Thank you :)