Miscellaneous: Today, I teach English in Taiwan. I got two new students, brothers... - FML

By Anonymous - 22/10/2010 01:03 - France

Today, I teach English in Taiwan. I got two new students, brothers named Harry and Potter. People, they're children, not pets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 687

You deserved it 5 051

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Same thing different taste

By harrypottermuch - 26/11/2009 11:50 - Canada

Today, I found out there's a Harry Potter club at my school. My boyfriend is in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 341

You deserved it 43 086

What word was it?

By BigBall - 09/09/2023 20:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, a tourist from an English-as-second-language country taught me a new word. In English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 686

Bad influence

By minder97 - 24/06/2021 16:01 - Canada

Today, my brother was suspended from school. He referred to himself as "Master" and two female classmates as his "bitches" in front of his teacher. He's ten years-old. What kind of family do I live in? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 032

You deserved it 116

By whoahshloann - 30/05/2009 23:48 - United States

Today, I was watching Harry Potter. When all the students at Hogwarts started to clap at one point, I started clapping myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 870

You deserved it 54 082

Potterheads

By collegestudent - 01/06/2019 12:00

Today, I was reading the seventh Harry Potter book at an airport. A woman asked me what I was reading, so I told her. She said, "Oh, so you have children?" Since I'm in my early twenties, I was taken aback and said no. She replied slower and louder, "Oh, so you have a childlike mind?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 124

You deserved it 353

By You're Not a Wizard - 30/06/2016 12:29

Today, I earned the nickname of "Harry Potter" for all the wrong reasons. I got locked in a storage cupboard for most of my shift, and couldn't get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 207

You deserved it 1 453

By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 04:49 - United States - Moorhead

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 272

You deserved it 6 286

By effiestonem154 - 02/04/2013 21:14 - United States

Today, the Chinese student I've been teaching English to got on stage in front of hundreds of people to read her final essay. She ended with, "What a fucking day." I don't swear, and I no longer have a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 356

You deserved it 2 861

By MissMSE - 18/09/2009 08:41 - Canada

Today, my friends took my phone and changed all the contact's names to characters from Harry Potter. I have over a hundred contacts and no idea who I'm talking to. I've been texting Draco Malfoy for 4 hours now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 081

You deserved it 4 549

Kids these days…

By Cindell Hanson - 02/03/2020 05:00

Today, a student told me to fuck off. I work with 3 year-olds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 745

You deserved it 182

Next

Top comments

harmon1 0

Friday 22 October 2010 9:01

**** their lives actually

thehelenlouiseee 5

Friday 22 October 2010 9:01

f their lives ;) I went to school with a Harriet potter and that was kinda bad

Comments

dreamit 0

Friday 22 October 2010 15:29

sux for the kid whose name is potter. lol

chobitschibi1369 0

Friday 22 October 2010 15:39

Wow.

peaches1328 0

Friday 22 October 2010 15:41

that sucks for the kids

dannyswin 0

Friday 22 October 2010 15:41

how is this an fml

Kitola 2

Friday 22 October 2010 15:45

I work as an after school enrichment instructor. At one of the schools I go to, there's a student named John Wang. It's hard to not snicker and want to put a cowboy hat on him.

nerdsgetmehot 22

Friday 22 October 2010 16:05

Harry Potter is amazing. That's all I have to say on this subject, lest I should be subjected to ridicule. (BRING IT!)

airforcebound 0

Friday 22 October 2010 16:39

dillwgaf

glitterypink 0

Friday 22 October 2010 16:39

I went to school with a girl named Granny Smith. There was a girl at my friends school named Anna Rexi

ScuseMePrincess 2

Saturday 23 October 2010 2:33

Some people named their daughter "Granny?" That's horrible.

qutii 0

Friday 22 October 2010 17:05

How is this an FML for you again?

erika622 0

Friday 22 October 2010 17:18

haha I work in a pediatric clinic and it's crazy all the stupid names u hear

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Keywords

Management Work Jealousy Love Relatable Mental health Relationship advice Awkward Friends Miscellaneous Healthy Lifestyle Health Food Ironic Mother in law Gifts Birthday Family Money Public freakouts Education Parents Students Exams Pranks Weird Argument AITA Insects Fear

The Top

Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 232

You deserved it 220

Today, I went on a first date. It started out OK, but halfway through he began "debating" me, talking just like Ben Shapiro. I thought he was joking, or at least satirising the worst way you could talk during a date. I was wrong; he was serious. I'm still not sure what set him off, but I couldn't get a word in edgeways in after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 211

You deserved it 261

The Top

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time after we made up from a huge fight. He loves my cat, but she's sick right now so she wouldn't play with him. He yelled at me for "making" her not like him by "telling her lies". FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 173

You deserved it 5 076

Today, I found out why my son has been working out and taking martial arts classes. It was so he could beat his stepbrother up and put him in the hospital, as revenge for stealing his secret cash supply, over £4000. I'm too old and too tired for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 570

You deserved it 442

Today, I watched as a bully told a kid, "I wish someone would staple your mouth shut so you would never talk again" right in front of the teacher. The teacher definitely heard it. She didn't get written up for it. Not even a verbal warning. I would pay to see a teacher actually punish someone in this school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 055

You deserved it 117

Today, ever since I let my boyfriend touch my boobs, he thinks it's appropriate to grope me whenever he feels like it. Even talking to him about it doesn't seem to stop him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 201

Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished I jokingly said, "who's going to sleep in the wet patch?". He got up and said "you're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing". It was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 422

You deserved it 4 506

Today, I was checking out of a hotel when I saw some complementary mints. They weren't mints. They were glass beads. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 503

You deserved it 11 772