Today, I teach English in Taiwan. I got two new students, brothers named Harry and Potter. People, they're children, not pets. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out there's a Harry Potter club at my school. My boyfriend is in it. FML
Today, a tourist from an English-as-second-language country taught me a new word. In English. FML
Today, my brother was suspended from school. He referred to himself as "Master" and two female classmates as his "bitches" in front of his teacher. He's ten years-old. What kind of family do I live in? FML
Today, I was watching Harry Potter. When all the students at Hogwarts started to clap at one point, I started clapping myself. FML
Today, I was reading the seventh Harry Potter book at an airport. A woman asked me what I was reading, so I told her. She said, "Oh, so you have children?" Since I'm in my early twenties, I was taken aback and said no. She replied slower and louder, "Oh, so you have a childlike mind?" FML
Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML
Today, the Chinese student I've been teaching English to got on stage in front of hundreds of people to read her final essay. She ended with, "What a fucking day." I don't swear, and I no longer have a job. FML
Today, my friends took my phone and changed all the contact's names to characters from Harry Potter. I have over a hundred contacts and no idea who I'm talking to. I've been texting Draco Malfoy for 4 hours now. FML
Today, a student told me to fuck off. I work with 3 year-olds. FML
Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
harmon1 0
**** their lives actually
thehelenlouiseee 5
f their lives ;) I went to school with a Harriet potter and that was kinda bad
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (168)
bfsd42 20
why is this an fml? not every amusing story is an fml.
bikermo 0
in my old neighborhood there was a family that had fled their homeland (can't remember what the homeland was, sorry) for the US and i believe one much older brother had died along the way, and the mother had the twins shortly after arriving and settling in Minnesota, which she had come to absolutely adore. thus, she named her twin boys Minne and Sota. cool story, but maybe they would have been neater as middle names...
lyris_fml 0
They live in Taiwan, not under a rock. I'm pretty sure they know what Harry Potter is.
NicoleMorganX3 0
is that Leigh?
Cabbotage 0
lucky is wasn't Justin and Beiber. annoying little sh*t that he is.
TheZarola 10
This is your FML... how?
Taurus_ChicKa 37
I don't know how this is your FML, it should be the kids'. Their parents are pathetic. How old are they, 12? Couldn't think of any better names? Those boys are going to be scarred for the rest of their lives because of the immature stupidity of the people that brought them into this world. And I'm not just saying that because I hate Harry Potter. It would be equally bad (but slightly more entertaining) if they'd been named Edward and Jacob. Seriously, those parents are so pathetic they shouldn't be allowed to procreate.
boatkicker 5
They have made movies based on the first 6 books. The seventh book is being broken up into two movies, and the first will be released on November 19th. The books have been translated into at least 64 other languages. I'm sure that students in Taiwan have, at the very least, heard of Harry Potter, if not read it themselves.
flippityfloop 0
"Today, I teach English in Taiwan." LOL, oh the irony...
vevi 0
my cousin's name is Daisy and she has a brother named Luigi.