Today, I spent three hours getting ready to go out to lunch with my boyfriend, only to find out he meant we're going to the McDonald's inside Wal-Mart so he can also pick up condoms. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date, destination unknown. I dressed up, he had a tux on. We went to McDonalds. FML
Today, I went out on a first date. He insisted we go to McDonald's and split a Happy Meal because he "didn't want to waste any money on a first date." FML
Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he was going to take me out somewhere special, so I called in sick for work. Turns out he had made reservations for the restaurant I worked at. FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend to the store to get groceries while I was at work. Instead of what I listed, he came back with hot pockets, ice cream and beer. I'm lactose intolerant and pregnant. FML
Today, we were planning to go out to dinner at our favorite restaurant. My kids and I were all dressed and ready to go when my husband waltzes in with fast food. He said he found some coupons for a free family meal. The kids and I got upset and he said, "I didn't have to get this for you guys." FML
Today, I went out with a girl I like. After a movie, we went to McDonald's. There was this couple making out. The girl I was with remarked about how lame it would be to go to McDonald's on a date. I thought we were on a date. FML
Today, I went to a fast food restaurant. The guy behind me was a pretty hot latin guy. When I went to pay, my purse fell off the counter. My birth control pills, a condom, 3 super plus tampons and an extra pair of underwear I keep in there for emergencies fell out at his feet. FML
Today, my husband thought I was still asleep while he was getting ready for work. How do I know? I watched him grab a condom out of his nightstand and put it in his lunchbox. FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by showing up at his place unannounced with some take-out food. I got there just in time to see him leave his block of flats with another girl. FML
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Top comments
Solkre 0
Three hours, were you sewing clothes?
koco4 0
I think she was literally putting on her face. I can understand if it was a first date, but not in a relationship. She just screams high maintenance.
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Comments (139)
Ikillyou2times 0
do you want to Super Size it?
letsgobucks 0
at least he's thinking of protection. women are so ungrateful
do_your_job 0
Maybe you should have spent 3 hours being a good gf and make him dinner. Then go to Wal-Mart and get condoms. Lazy. But in all seriousness, 3 hours?? YDI for expecting too much and taking EXTREMELY excessive time getting ready.
yoyo724 0
Who cares if she took 3 hours to get ready? At least she was trying to look good for her man only to taken to lunch at McDonalds. But I agree with everyone who said it's just a matter of communication...I don't know why you wouldn't ask where you were going.
fmlreader2010 0
First off, who takes 3 hours getting ready? Second, at least he's being safe. You two should definitely not reproduce.
ckrebbs 0
hahahahhaha where in the hell was he in the 3 hours it took you to get ready?
Big_Al120 0
condoms are for sailors
GermanySucks 0
Three ******* hours to get ready, wtf?! Do you get plastic surgery every time you go out to lunch? That's absolutely ridiculous...my women have to look good when I wake up next to them, not after spending three hours caking on the make up or getting a face-lift...
blankettt 0
Even as a female, I will never understand what in the hell some people do in the process of getting ready that ends up taking three hours. Even when I need to look my best, this including a shower, makeup, and doing my hair, it only take me an hour and twenty minutes at THE MOST. That's even if I have to shave. That's just pathetic.
spazzman 0
walmart? loser. never go with anyone who steps foot in that store.