Today, I spent three hours getting ready to go out to lunch with my boyfriend, only to find out he meant we're going to the McDonald's inside Wal-Mart so he can also pick up condoms. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date, destination unknown. I dressed up, he had a tux on. We went to McDonalds. FML
Today, I went out on a first date. He insisted we go to McDonald's and split a Happy Meal because he "didn't want to waste any money on a first date." FML
Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he was going to take me out somewhere special, so I called in sick for work. Turns out he had made reservations for the restaurant I worked at. FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend to the store to get groceries while I was at work. Instead of what I listed, he came back with hot pockets, ice cream and beer. I'm lactose intolerant and pregnant. FML
Today, we were planning to go out to dinner at our favorite restaurant. My kids and I were all dressed and ready to go when my husband waltzes in with fast food. He said he found some coupons for a free family meal. The kids and I got upset and he said, "I didn't have to get this for you guys." FML
Today, I went out with a girl I like. After a movie, we went to McDonald's. There was this couple making out. The girl I was with remarked about how lame it would be to go to McDonald's on a date. I thought we were on a date. FML
Today, I went to a fast food restaurant. The guy behind me was a pretty hot latin guy. When I went to pay, my purse fell off the counter. My birth control pills, a condom, 3 super plus tampons and an extra pair of underwear I keep in there for emergencies fell out at his feet. FML
Today, my husband thought I was still asleep while he was getting ready for work. How do I know? I watched him grab a condom out of his nightstand and put it in his lunchbox. FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by showing up at his place unannounced with some take-out food. I got there just in time to see him leave his block of flats with another girl. FML
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Top comments
Solkre 0
Three hours, were you sewing clothes?
koco4 0
I think she was literally putting on her face. I can understand if it was a first date, but not in a relationship. She just screams high maintenance.
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Comments (139)
davek 36
I'm gonna call YDI for spending 3 hours getting ready for lunch... did you think you were going to the Ritz or something?
BakNBitz 0
that's what happens when you take 3 hours to get ready to go to lunch. really, who has that much time?
yumesupernova 0
I say YDI because he obviously thinks you're hot and wants to have some fun with you, if you know what I mean... *nudge nudge wink wink*
ClouDn9n 0
Make the best of it. Buy a milkshake. Go home with it. Rub it all over his manhood. Have fun. Thank me later.
JanisEvans 10
Nice! :D
ladeadenotte 2
FYL?!?? you are getting laid by your bf. who cares the prior meal. kinda ironic you're both eating out ;-)
TNT1115 0
I'd do that too
Hockeygurl17 0
who spends three hours getting ready u mustve been poppin pimples the whole time hehe losa
ksharp 0
it's lunch when do couples go any where nice for lunch
Cinn_fml 23
When you say nice do you mean "where the food is actually what they claim it is"? If that is the case, then yes. But if by nice you mean "posh restaurant" then no, not for lunch.
Amortentia 0
There is no effing reason to spend 3 hours getting ready for anything less than your wedding...or perhaps prom. -_- Seriously...what did you have to do? Shower, dry hair, dress, brush teeth, make-up...an hour at the MOST!
RileyL29 0
3 hours getting ready? wtf...?