Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my ex-girlfriend's number. She texted back, "One of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got my phone fixed and the lady who was working on it somehow resent all the old text messages in my outbox. One was to my ex saying, "I love you." FML
Today, I felt like letting my ex know just how I felt about all the bullshit he put me through. I dug up his number, typed a long paragraph with lots of pain and emotion, and sent it. The reply was, "No wonder he broke up with you." Thanks, whoever has that number now. FML
Today, I received a "Happy Birthday" text from my ex. I thought maybe she missed me, but when I replied with a polite, "Thank you," they responded with "Sorry, wrong person. However, fuck you." Ouch. Happy birthday to me, indeed. FML
Today, feeling so depressed to the point of having suicidal thoughts, I texted a girl I had a crush on. Her response? "Can you please delete my number, you're getting annoying." FML
Today, I sent out a Happy Snow Day text to 20 of my closest friends. My boyfriend, who doesn't have an iPhone, didn't realize it was a group text. He sent back a text breaking up with me. To all the people in the group message. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My ex just sent me a text. I read it, happy he had remembered. He wanted me to know he has a new girlfriend. FML
Today, I was deleting old contacts on WhatsApp of people I no longer talk to. Later, when I was very tired and was about to go to bed, I sent a text to my boyfriend saying love you and goodnight. It turns out it was actually my ex. Awkward! FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams' phone number. After texting her "Hey, is this Stephanie?" I got response saying "Sorry bro, I know how you feel, she did the same thing to me." FML
Today, I sent the texts "I love and miss you babe ;)" and "Shit wrong person" to my ex just so he would think I have a life. FML
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Top comments
Tsukasa_fml 0
You're better off without her if she can't appreciate that.
JBiz_fml 0
I never new there was a star wars day ...
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Comments (392)
CourtneeMalakian 0
#15 stfu u couldnt dump somebody cuz u have nobody to dump. and he never said he was a virgin so stfu and get over urself dumbass
Jasper_fml 0
whats your number?
FYL23 0
is this danny? and you too!
FYL23 0
is this danny? and you too!
gypsyCajun 0
even ex-girlfriends should be able to appreciate clever star wars witicisms
blech123 0
HA HA HA that's funny but seriously march 14 is better cause it pi day ha ha do you get it 3.14 =)
freedoggy77 0
YDI for not deleting her all together...plus for sending a nerd text like that to everyone
Jaywin 3
#90 I'm sure a lot of us got that when we read it. Doesn't change the fact that it's lame. I'm not knocking the OP because he has the right to enjoy or not enjoy whatever he wants but I gotta compliment the ex-girlfriend on a nice burn.
tiltwrestler 0
Ew, #75... "get over myself"? What exactly does that mean? Last time I checked, the only thing i've done is make fun of this guy for being a class A f*ggot, and then pointing out that I do football, yes (AFTER THE GUY ASKED!!!). So how do I, in any way, shape, or form, need to "get over myself"? Just because I have standards, friends, and a life doesn't mean that I'm somehow cocky or self-absorbed or full of myself. And in past experience, it's people who say "you're full of yourself" who are the most full of themselves. Ever noticed that the problems you see the most in others, are often the problems you share yourself? Difference between us: I'm not full of myself, but I do have friends. You... well, I don't know you yet. But i do know you're ugly, and that I would never date you, and that I get better than you easily. So don't think you're hot stuff, girly girl; cuz nobody I hang around with would even think about dating somebody who looked like you, except if they needed to "get a release" after a long day. So you're not tite, you don't look good, and stop acting all high and mighty, cuz i'm not anymore full of myself than you are, and nobody likes you anyway. =P Oh, btw, nice hair. THO!!! And I'm done wasting my time with you *******... later. Hahaha. I don't even know why I got on here to begin with. What a waste of time
jodie_jailbreak 0
So I read this and thought it was funny and decided to send it to some of my friends as a joke. I got replies like this "wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww that's all i'm saying", "Don't talk to me ever again," and "You're such a dork." YAY me :) LOL