Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" in a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML
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Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML
Today, my little brother was playing with my cat, getting it to chase a laser pointer. He thought it would be funny to shine the laser pointer over my nuts. FML
Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML
Today, my older brother told me that the only reason I like cats is because they control minds. I laughed. He was serious. FML
Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML
Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML
Today, I noticed my kitten was growling and twitching in his sleep. I tried to wake him up by gently prodding him. He responded by waking up and attacking my face. FML
Today, my 20-year-old sister is taking care of my cat while I am out of state. She sent a photo of him "playing in a silly way" with her kitty. I then had to very seriously explain to her that in the photo, my cat and her cat were trying to make more cats. FML
Today, I meowed at my cat and he got really close to me. I then meowed again and he punched me in the face. Them's fightin' words, it seems. FML
Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML
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Top comments
paperfox_fml 0
You didn't deserve that. But maybe next time instead of telling him that he can't go near it because it doesn't like him, teach him how to handle it properly.
Helinacoustic 0
Karma. And cats have a sense of irony.
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Comments (65)
Bautista_fml 0
hahahaha
sb_rph 0
even though i don't like little kids very much, i'm on your brother's side... you need to explain how to be gentle with animals to your little brother rather than say mean things to him, even if you were joking. they take things like that seriously at that age. you deserve to be clawed by the kitten. and anyway, it's just a little kitten, it really couldn't have hurt that much. i've had kittens, i know.
lalaroo 0
haha I just got a new kitten and I say that to my five year old brother! But my parents started saying it to him too after he 'accidentally' dropped her down the stairs.
ilive4fml 0
omg thats AWFUL
tasteslikeloud 0
Obviously the kitten could defend it's self
kittykat1501 31
It is self, huh? ;) ;)
frustrated20 8
i hate cats they're evil... get a dog
Primmly 11
If the cat had a problem with it, he would have left. Cats can take care of themselves you know. YDI.
kittykat1501 31
Karma shall no longer be referred to as a female dog, but a female cat