Today, I saw a naked man for the first time in my life. It was the nude model in my art class. I was forced to draw wrinkles and fat rolls in places I didn't even know existed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, in my art class we had to paint a nude portrait of a fat, old woman. About halfway through the piece, and while painting her fat rolls, I realized she was the only person other than myself I had ever seen naked. FML
Today, I found out my mom is the nude model for an art class at my college. FML
Today, I saw a naked woman for the first time. Too bad it was my 73-year-old grandmother, who was doing gymnastics in the nude. I can’t unsee this. FML
Today, I saw my mom naked as she came out of the shower. I realized that's the first time I've ever seen a naked woman. I'm a 24 year old guy. FML
She's a model and she's looking good
Today, in art class, our instructor called me up to the front to model for a drawing. I agreed to pose because it was nice to be called on, and I needed a self-esteem boost. He then thanked me, saying it's a great exercise for the class to draw such strange proportions. FML
Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML
Today, my dad went through my room while I was out and threw away the "inappropriate pictures" that he found. They're the nudes I've been working on for art class. FML
Artistry
Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML
Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML
Go home
Today, I saw my dad naked. How? He came into the room I was staying in, drunk. I'm gonna need a whole lot of therapy. FML
Top comments
faithxoxox 1
I wonder how old the OP is that this is only the first time s/he has seen a naked man. Nonetheless, FYL.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
It is impossible to have internet access and avoid seeing a naked man. Impossible.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (80)
Pentium_4 27
In a school? Wow lol. Couldn't they have picked the statue of David to start? At least drawing a fat naked guy could be good for your shading skills
Amrel 10
Im assuming your in college so the question is, how havent you got laid?!
eyeIoveyou 4
Don't rule out the few people who are saving their virginity until their wedding day.
Amrel 10
Your right i sorr-... what? I apolagi-... Hmmm thats weird. Well you get what im saying like when some one cant finish a
eyeIoveyou 4
...no, I don't understand what you're trying to say. It's disappointing that the majority of people think that being a virgin when you're still in college is a bad thing.
Amrel 10
I never said it was a bad thing hell im totally fine with it, its just the storys my older friends and family say just makes college seem more like: party at my house! All till the week is over! Plenty of sec and drugs will be involved! So what im trying to say is, that it is expected not right. Im sorry for the misunderstanding
The_Weirdo 10
Well, maybe when you're* in collage, you will understand.
Amrel 10
Well maybe when you realize this is the internet, and not an Enlgish class you will understand
shadexilmaendu 4
Open mouth, insert foot. I wanna go to collage! There will be lots of pictures, right? o.o
MedKits 9
Contrary to popular opinion, colleges are actually more about advanced learning then drugs, sex and partying. What a surprise, right?
Shelta957 13
43- *College That's ironic
DocBastard 40
Amrel - see all those thumbs-down on your comments? That should tell you something. Your comment was stupid, your defense of it was inane, and your defense of your poor grammar and spelling is appalling.
mom2pen 4
Like Tim Tebow!
Amrel 10
Why should my grammar matter on the internet? Am i gettting graded for it? Do i benefit from flawless grammar on a comment to a website? When you can come up with a valid reason as to why i should start using proper grammar on the internet or even listen to a complete stranger for all i know who lives thousands of miles away from me. Tell me the benefits of using proper grammar on a comment. This is for commenting not for pointing out everyones grammatical errors. I would use good grammar if this was my ******* english and its for a grade, not cause some guy whos all up on his ******* high horse putting people down for not using proper punctuations thinking to himself: wow what a retard he forgot the comma! He is such a ******* idiot! Who are you to try to put me down just because i misspelled something or forgot a puncuation? If you actually take a guy grammatical errors so serious on a website then you need to take a brake and not be such a hardass on the internet Doc
jmalaer 5
Amrel, the first sentence after all your questions is sentence fragment and therefore I didn't finish reading your non sense because it bothered me so much.
DocBastard 40
Amrel - see the comment immediately above this one for your answer. It clarifies things perfectly. Your continued defense of your shortcomings is only deepening the hole you've dug for yourself.
penguinazul 13
Amrel, it's important to use proper grammar anywhere that communication is involved because you want people to be able to understand and comprehend the message you're trying to convey. When you're talking, it's one thing because people can actually hear what you're saying. Here, where everything is text-based, it makes it harder for us to be able to understand you; therefore, it's important to make yourself as clear as possible when you're trying to converse with someone. Believe it or not, the skills you are being taught when you write essays for school apply anywhere that uses written forms of communication. You should use them so that they become more developed; if you ignore them simply because you're not in a school-setting, then you're defeating the purpose of being taught the skills in the first place.
mrnvisible 1
Correct grammar, spell college wrong.
constantine91 0
I bet he liked that... :/ there should be an age limit for people to model.
paintingxflowers 8
The FML only said that the model was fat, not old.
paintingxflowers 8
WHOOPS, just saw the wrinkles part. sorry, go ahead and bury my comment while I go cry in the corner.
GoW_Chick 15
This was an art class not a photo shoot, art isn't about pretty and perfection it's about the persons view on the subject and how they decide to draw it.
Dracoboxer357 36
Why should there be an age limit of nude models? Since when is art about only drawing society's standard of accepted beauty between the ages of 18 and 29? :p
hungryparadox 6
To 78 - As a victim of molestation and rape, I am completely in favor of age of consent laws and it being illegal for an underage person to be a nude model. If you had a child, let's say a daughter age 14. Would you be fine with adult men viewing her body? Most people wouldn't. And don't get me wrong, the same would go with an underage boy (I'm not one of those assholes who believes that only girls can be victims) I'm just saying. Just the thought of viewing a child (someone under the age of 18) like that, just really creeps me out.
GoW_Chick 15
I think he was saying more that the older ages should be able to model nude, I am also sorry for your experiences you had to endure no one should have to go through that.
DocBastard 40
Hungryparadox - reread the thread. Your comment, while entirely true, unfortunately doesn't apply.
constantine91 0
I am a victim myself and that is NOT what I meant. Nude models should definitely be over the age of 19. I meant there should be an age limit meaning anyone over 70 or whatever shouldn't be allowed to be a nude model as its kind of gross. nude models- 19+ I am aware that even old wrinkly bodies can also be great art.
constantine91 0
Oops just realized her comment was directed at 78. Sorry!!
downtime 13
80, Rape and age of consent have nothing to do with each other. If you were raped then you were raped. If you agreed to have sex with someone and then decided later it was a bad idea then you could refer to age of consent.
SirWrangler 5
Hello Class! Today we will be learning about the effects and application in the art of mentally scaring your mind. Observe.
thats_my_job 11
Had to *like* due to the "observe".
pilotoenrique 0
How old are you?
iDaniel525 8
Old enough.
menace23 0
You virgin lol.
Nukorav 2
It would have been funnier if the OP was home schooled.
eleynaxo626 0
Not funny.. I was homeschooled and I am not the least bit sheltered. I have standards, unlike most people these days, but that doesn't mean I havn't seen stuff. Try to be informed next time...
downtime 13
152 is proof that home-schooling isn't necessarily better than public schooling.
A100893 30
You're officially an artist, daring to draw what no one else wants to see. (On a serious note: Try not to think about the model, focus on the drawing. Maybe eventually you'll forget about what you're drawing. If not, search ebay for brain bleach.)
1JDub 6
I bet he had an ipod playing Im sexy and I know it.....I work out!! F your eyeballs...
suxs4ulol 22
I wonder how old the nude model was and how old op is?
RabidBunny 10
Did you know that we also have tails, OP? :)