Today, I received a cute letter in my locker. It was in German, so I used Google translate. Apparently, someone hopes I choke on big fat cock. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML
Today, I sent the girl I like a Twinkie with a note saying "Enjoy! You deserve it". I found out later through an angry email that someone had written "you damn fatty" on the end of the note. FML
Today, my sex-crazed ex wrote me a letter so bad, it haunts me that I let a guy with such terrible grammar skills touch my boobs. FML
Today, I tried to sweet talk my crush by texting them in Spanish using Google Translate. I wanted to say, “You look amazing today,” but it translated to something like, “Your fish smells weird today.” They responded with a confused emoji and “¿Qué?” FML
Today, I gathered the courage and wrote a love letter to put in the girl I like's school bag, at the end of classes. I felt anxious for a response. Her bag turned out to be her cousin's, and I became a joke in the classroom. FML
Today, I received an envelope with my name written in beautiful writing in my mailbox. I just moved in the day before and hadn't given the address to anyone or met my neighbors yet so I was a bit surprised by it, even more surprised to find nothing but a dick pic inside. FML
Today, I received the only love letter I've ever gotten. Too bad it's from the guy who's been stalking me. FML
Today, I wrote my boyfriend a sexy letter designed to arouse him. I described what I wanted us to do to each other in the most erotic way. Later, he came up to me and hugged me, saying it was the funniest thing he ever read and he's glad he's in love with a girl with such a great sense of humor. FML
Today, I received an email from my boyfriend. It contained a link to a site that was titled "How to Give Head". It also said "Have a nice day!" FML
Today, I found a love letter in my mail. It was from a girl I met at a bar few weeks ago. I never gave her my address or last name. I guess I have a stalker now. FML
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Top comments
glittercookies 12
He probably meant on his.
DontClickOnMe 28
Aww, someone has a secret admirer. Too bad, they're rude.
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Comments (120)
Bheka 1
German to English or English to German translation @ google translate is crap. Through translating 'Welcome in ...' four times I got 'We accept you in...'. Especially German is tough to translate because we have some words with 5+ translations to Englisch. I know it. I'm german.
Genoc123 5
Ok it was me,lol
yogamaster9000 0
In German that's an idiom for "I love you"
nic7973 23
could be worse, they may have wished for you to choke on a small one!
michela_yates 0
hahahah!!! I wonder who it was from
JayJavaMonsterr 10
DON'T TRUST GOOGLE TRANSLATE! THEIR TRANSLATIONS SUCK!
Vkins 9
It would be pretty awesome if you could post the letter here. Native German dude reporting in, willing to translate properly.
speedy420 0
fantastic mein frauline ^-^
sdeniro 6
Omfg I almost shitted myself!!
thatsabiggun 11
well now u know hitler really did love you, he hopes u give a deepthroat to someone