Today, my sex-crazed ex wrote me a letter so bad, it haunts me that I let a guy with such terrible grammar skills touch my boobs. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I got a message from the girl I like. She told me to never speak to her again and not even look at her any more. Apparently the letter I wrote to her was perverted, vile and nasty. I never wrote her a letter. FML
Today, I discovered that my ex-girlfriend writes erotic fiction describing all of my moves in intimate detail. The whole internet gets to critique my entire sexual repertoire. FML
Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Halfway through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She now won't talk to me. FML
Today, I wrote my boyfriend a sexy letter designed to arouse him. I described what I wanted us to do to each other in the most erotic way. Later, he came up to me and hugged me, saying it was the funniest thing he ever read and he's glad he's in love with a girl with such a great sense of humor. FML
Today, I received the only love letter I've ever gotten. Too bad it's from the guy who's been stalking me. FML
Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML
Today, my creepy, stalker ex-girlfriend was given an anonymous love letter. She's convinced it's from me. FML
Today, I was sexting my ex in a bad choice whirlwind, but I accidentally sent it to the guy I've just met. I immediately knew the message wasn’t meant for him, and that it ruined our chances of dating. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. When we took a break and went downstairs, he checked the mail. He had received a letter from his ex-girlfriend, which he opened in front of me. He then began sobbing on my shoulder and broke up with me. He still had to drive me home. FML
Today, my crazy psychopath of a neighbor sent me an email with the subject, "So, about your sex life." I've been sitting here for 20 minutes staring at it because I'm too scared to open it. FML
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Top comments
killuhand 12
"I want boob touch u very best"
raininginseattle 9
Did he write you the letter in crayons and draw pretty pictures?
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Comments (110)
sunnyray812 42
That would surely drive me up the wall.
Welshite 39
That's why you should always use public transportation.
goldenturtlez 7
Only if you want to end up on fml, I've noticed
kazrron 5
Thats why you pick the nice boys over jocks? you sorta diserve it.. but ill still say fyl because sometimes people dont act like their real self until its too late :/
CallMeMcFeelii 13
What's the problem with athletic people, 39? I think you've watched too many high school movies. I played football back in high school and I got pretty damn good grades. I hate when people think just because you were into sports you weren't smart. That's a stupid ass thing to say. It's also pretty dumb thinking we were all assholes too. Just because some of us enjoyed playing sports doesn't mean we're a bunch of dicks who can't read.
roza043 14
Actually, excersising the body can often help excersise the brain, so I don't really see how those stereotypes work out in reality.
isallwaysme 27
45, not sure if its just where i live, but most people who play sports are complete assholes. like, towards everyone. Im not saying all of them are like that, its just the majority around here are
\ 28
#52 The truth is, most of them develop a superiority complex. One kid I know who was sent to the office for bullying my sis got away from getting suspended just because he was on his school's football team. The stature goes to their heads sometimes... But not all are like that...
kyu_Q 19
They're is a reason the "jock" stereotype exist. Unfortunately most jocks are assholes. The ones who arent are usually smart. it just seems the bigger dumber guys gravitate to sports.
squideth 18
39 is just a bitter, sexist high school kid who thinks he's a "nice guy". Ignore him.
raininginseattle 9
Did he write you the letter in crayons and draw pretty pictures?
\ 28
He most likely wrote them with his ****.
Trix_Disorder 20
He hasn't upgraded to crayons yet; still on finger paints.
Dodge4x4Ram 46
he never got to to home run,, he didn't really get anywhere
killuhand 12
"I want boob touch u very best"
gc327072 30
"I love you long time. Is good idea we get back together"
Clay_Pidgeon 11
I don, see da problam heere. Y do eryone hav to be Gramar Nezzis thes daze.
ForkymeetsPorky 15
It's him!
jigglypuff34 16
Hmmm "wrote me a letter so bad". Is that proper grammar? Doesn't sound correct to me. Grammar Experts help.
JDCH_99 10
It's proper though a bit awkward.
AnOriginalName 19
A bit awkward? The awkwardness and irony are so strong and unsettling that they're making me twitch.
dangerika93 11
What I am trying to figure out is what the heck is that thing in your profile picture #25!?
DyslexicPanda 12
I'm betting an elephant seal
kazrron 5
#25 is* talk about grammer and you dun ****** up yorself
roza043 14
Next time you want somebody to look bad, be sure that you're correct about their "faults".
graceinsheepwear 33
41, "are" is correct. There were two things-awkwardness and irony-so a plural verb is correct.
PANDALEGIT 8
He wrote me a letter so grammatically incorrect that it made me regret ever letting him touch my boobs
graceinsheepwear 33
65, you too? That guy gets around!
VeganVampyre 26
It should have said the letter was badly written, or grammatically incorrect, or even full of mistakes, because yes, the OP's grammar was incorrect. However, that doesn't mean she can't complain about someone whose grammar is much, much worse than her own. Everyone is allowed a mistake or two.
goldenturtlez 7
I cnt blve he gt tu tuch yur boubs Hy whtcha dooin 2 knight?
sarcasticlover 30
op said his grammar was bad not spellings
Rainhawk94 27
wait wread it wong. ho oh
ninjalovin 8
This is why I always test my dates before I let them touch my boobs.
rugby_lover09 13
@7: How do you test your dates? Do you give them grammar tests?
mFUNdo21 17
my sister makes them fill out a dating application xD
Llama_Face89 33
14- ha! That's incredible. What's on the application?
jw90 18
@ 19, they have to be interested in everything she likes. Can't be a douchebag. Must always give their undivided attention over everything else.
SimplyBird 9
but it says you're a guy...
Enslaved 36
Dating application questionnaire: What do you like most in a woman? "My ****" may not be the best answer. :P
graceinsheepwear 33
Is it an oral exam?
GoddessOfCookies 14
I understand how shit grammar hurts you. I really do. But eould you not have seen his way of writing/heard his way of speaking previously?
JulianaBlackburn 19
I think the bigger problem is that you're getting letters from your sex-crazed ex.
\ 28
Interesting how "ex" is two-thirds of "sex"
Chumbowamba 10
its also have of next.
Chumbowamba 10
correction... half of next.. lol
itsmecutiepie 17
I'm curious, what did the letter say? Definitely need a follow-up on this one.
Rainhawk94 27
no I'm sure he's a creep. you know with him sending letters to her and all
razzledazzle21 23
I'm assuming since OP described him as sex-crazed that it had something to do with wanting to.. Take her to church. Yeah that's probably it.
goldenturtlez 7
I always have the dirtiest thoughts there... "The Lord loves you, you..... And heylow loooves you ;)"