Today, I realized the moans I make when masturbating sound like I'm crying. I realized this when my neighbor pounded on the door asking if I was okay. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
Today, I found out the "sex noises" I heard from next door last night, which I'd angrily yelled at my neighbor for, were actually from him having an uncontrollable seizure. FML
Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML
Today, I heard some rhythmic moaning from the apartment next door. It took me 10 minutes to realize that my neighbor was not having it off, she was actually vacuuming her apartment. It's been so long since I've had sex that I can't even recognize the sound of other people having it. FML
Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML
Today, I heard my roommate moaning my name in the shower. FML
Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML
Today, I was masturbating on my inflatable air mattress that squeaks when you move. Suddenly, my mom burst into my room to ask if I was okay because she thought the squeaking was me crying. I ripped my hands from my pants and turned on my side; she walked over and grabbed my hands to console me. FML
Today, I started to cry while masturbating. This isn't the first time that this has happened. FML
Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML
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Top comments
The_9th_Doctor 18
just wow. maybe take it down a notch
jessBeAqueen 13
soooo when you cry...does it sound like your masturbating ? would create awkward sympathy hugs
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Comments (80)
ohdannyboyy 8
Just say go away! Im trying to "cry" in peace!
NatalieF 5
well, at least your neighbor cares ?
fakedsincerity 32
maybe your neighbour just wanted a sneak peek.
Obey_StudBoii 23
Tone it down a notch OP lol.
guitardude69 11
Looks like someone got a new bodyguard!
bosox29 14
Your comment, it makes no sense!
themogsta7 5
You must be really loud if your neighbor can hear you through a house O.O
Fuhkyoo 17
well op could be living in a town home/ apartment. you'd have to be trying to disturb you neighbors for them to hear you through the walls of separated homes.
DustyStorm 16
Definitely wouldn't make me, while ordering dessert in a diner, wanna say, "I'll have what she's having!"
outoftown 26
^^^ Props for the reference!
vipirius 18
If only people didn't thumb down comments just because they don't get the reference.
DustyStorm 16
Agreed! For those who don't know.... The famous scene in a diner, in When Harry Met Sally, where Sally fakes an ****** for Harry asking him if he would really know if a woman was faking it...being very convincing and not very quiet, another diner customer says, "I'll have what she's having..."
slithergirl 5
Nice neighbor
Sarairwin49 22
nice that your neighbour is concerned and all, but tone it down a bit? xD
olpally 32
Calm down Quagmire. Jesus. Lol.