Today, I heard some rhythmic moaning from the apartment next door. It took me 10 minutes to realize that my neighbor was not having it off, she was actually vacuuming her apartment. It's been so long since I've had sex that I can't even recognize the sound of other people having it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came back to my dorm only to hear my neighbor having loud sex. I thought I was just thinking when I said, "At least do it against the other wall," but when I was left later on, he walked by, apologized and said that he thought I wasn't home, and promised to be more quiet next time. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
Today, I realized the moans I make when masturbating sound like I'm crying. I realized this when my neighbor pounded on the door asking if I was okay. FML
Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML
Today, I was lying in bed listening to my neighbors have loud, and what sounded like, enjoyable sex. My boyfriend rolled over and said, "she sounds like fun" before rolling back over and going to sleep. It's been four months. FML
Today, I heard grunting and then realized it was my tenant with his boyfriend. When I went down to do my laundry, I caught them in the act. FML
Today, my seventy-year-old male live-in landlord asked if I'd heard a low humming noise the last few nights, around midnight, as someone had mentioned it. I feigned ignorance, whilst silently lamenting the decline of my self-pleasure opportunities. FML
Today, I found out the "sex noises" I heard from next door last night, which I'd angrily yelled at my neighbor for, were actually from him having an uncontrollable seizure. FML
Today, I can hear my parents having sex in the next room. FML
Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML
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Top comments
alexandriababyy 0
watch ****
perdix 31
YDI for not being resourceful enough to know how to use household appliances to relieve sexual frustration. Especially when you have a neighbor that puts on demonstrations.
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Comments (25)
Bananaaa_fml 0
awwww :P lol, u kno im always here if u want to learn wat it sounds like again :D
redbluegreen 41
LMAO. FML, the new internet dating site. ;D
Bananaaa_fml 0
LOL it should be aye, that would be funny
Bananaaa_fml 0
yea thats what im thinking :P
Bananaaa_fml 0
im joking btw
alexandriababyy 0
watch ****
604 11
HahahaHAHAHAhahahaha
NathanKett 0
YDI for liking a sweaty dick up the ass
cbdee 8
LMAO!!
bosshaug 0
I agree with nathan his logic is just so reasonable
danis_fml 12
have you even done it with someone else?
lahp 0
no. he has done it with a hoover (vacuum) that is why he got confused :D
petergurll 0
OP is a girl
cbdee 8
Hahahahha!!! Poor poor vacuum!
stupiddumbblonde 0
...did I really need to know that??
Kill2BU 0
You need to get out more and meet more people.
Aj_teh_cool 0
so?