By oldsoulyoungbody - 30/01/2012 15:07 - United States
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I read #2 comment and the first thing that popped into my mind was the movie "Marie Antoinette" where they were in bed, but the king had erectile dysfunction so they never really had sex. Maybe your husband has erectile dysfunction and is too embarrassed to tell you, OP! :o
I think that's sweet. A relationship where just lying next to each other is intimate enough. I wouldn't stress about it. It might take longer periods in between each love making session, but it won't completely stop. Be thankful you both have each other.
Actually...it's not. A romantic relationship includes the sexual stuff too. Even if that slows down once you're older and married, it's still what keeps a relationship healthy. And because they posted it on fml I don't think the OP is happy with just sleeping next to their spouse.
SecretMe - I totally agree with you, though it sounds like the sex HAS stopped. Pinkcrayola - when you get married and have kids, THEN you can comment on what is normal and healthy in a relationship. Childhood (ie teen) relationships are based on sex. Long-term adult relationships are based on trust and mutual respect. Sex is yet another small part in a very complex arrangement.
While you are technically correct, DocBastard, I don't feel it really applies to this FML. I'm sensing that the problem isn't precisely the lack of sex, but rather the lack of trust, respect, and understanding, which in turn can lead to less frequent sexual activity. It seems like the desire to be intimate with each other has worn out, which is of course, not a healthy thing for a relationship. My interpretation of this FMl is that they just feel distant from each other.
I agree that relationships change a you get older and maybe I'm not the most qualified to know how a marriage should be handled. But I disagree that sex is only important as a teenager. Look at the rate of cheating in marriages. Not all of that is sexual, but I'm willing to bet some of it is. Obviously sex is still an important factor at later ages and should be taken into account. Yes the relationship tends to be more mature and other things come into play. And, the desire for sex is less because of hormones I think. But I still think some sex is one of the several factors in setting any romantic relationship apart from a friendship.
Shrooms, I didn't interpret it that way. I just read it as their sex life died. Could be kids, money issues, whatever. We're both making assumptions, and that's dangerous. Pinkcrayola - if you admit that you aren't qualified, why continue the argument? I'm not trying to be rude (FOR ONCE!), but once you're older, you'll see it from a different perspective. I never said sex isn't important in a marriage (reread my comment), but it is in no way what holds a relationship together.
@DocBastard I have to agree with you. Sex isn't a major facor in relationships. This generation though seems to more revolve around it. There are real relationships in teens though. I have seen quite a few so real love, honesty, and trust is still there; its just something you don't see often anymore. Oh to the guy who brought up cheating, if you cheat on your wife/husband you were never truly in love. If you were you would know doing such thoughts dont even pop up in your head. Okay im done writing to a post no one will read.
Maybe you should talk to him about it I am sure he can eractionfiy the problem
You could feel sorry for yourself, or you could get on top of him and have some fun. Or, to quote The Shawshank Redemption: Get busy living, or get busy dying.
well it's easy, i'll frame it out for you. she should blanket herself with soft fabric. then he should comforter and lay her down in a canopy of love. rub her footboards gently and massage her side rails, and before long she'll feel how sprung you are and give you some headboard in your crib. ladies remember, kinky sex can set a strong foundation for relationships.
It's better than being in operate beds, rooms, our divorced. Maybe you should take initiative and change the positions if you don't like them.