Health: Today, I realized that if you are dreaming that you have diarrhea,... - FML

By crap - 17/01/2014 16:24 - United States - Mansfield

Today, I realized that if you are dreaming that you have diarrhea, you probably have diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 066

You deserved it 4 423

Summer vacations: Sun and blunders
From beaches to campsites, embark on a journey filled with laughter under the sun... and a few sunburns! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By rj93 - 05/11/2011 13:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned if you dream you're having a piss, you most likely are having a piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 372

You deserved it 5 847

Number one or number two?

By Anonymous - 25/09/2023 13:00 - Australia

Today, I found out that the myth about what happens when you dream you're going to the toilet is not entirely untrue. At least for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 583

You deserved it 73

No shit

By Anonymous - 26/03/2022 11:00 - Australia - Aspley

Today, I had a dream that I was having one of the best poops of my life. I woke up feeling very content and relaxed, until I rolled over and realised it wasn't a dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 917

You deserved it 214

You sleep in your pants?

By Anonymous - 01/03/2021 18:30 - United States - Randolph

Today, I dreamt that I was using the toilet. The toilet was a dream, but the rest wasn't. My pants were soaked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 154

Geometry

By sickpuppy - 08/09/2019 12:00

Today, I learned the hard way that when sick, throw up, then have diarrhea. Not the other way round. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 419

You deserved it 164

By Anonymous - 21/11/2015 10:03 - United States - Norwalk

Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 035

You deserved it 2 310

Nearly did a Jimi Hendrix

By Courtney - 30/10/2022 14:00

Today, I had a dream in which I was throwing up. Turns out it wasn’t a dream and I woke up to puke all over the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 811

You deserved it 109

Two states of matter

By Anonymous - 15/09/2020 05:02 - Germany

Today, I learned that is it possible to be constipated and have diarrhea at the same time. You run to the toilet every half-hour, but almost nothing comes out and you feel so bloated you could burst, while eating almost nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 366

You deserved it 139

By Anonymous - 26/09/2018 23:00 - United States - Perrysburg

Today, I got random constipation followed by diarrhea. It's 1:30am and my sleeping medication is making me fall asleep, but every time I try to get off the toilet I get another diarrhea spasm. Either I fall asleep on the toilet or shit myself in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 982

You deserved it 222

By Anonymous - 22/09/2018 13:30

Today, I apparently had diarrhea in my sleep. I had to get up and sneak to the bathroom so as to not wake my husband. When he asked about the stain, I panicked and told him I started my period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 580

You deserved it 418

Next

Top comments

lilmslady 11

Friday 17 January 2014 21:12

I guess dreams really do come true

leroyjenkins006 10

Friday 17 January 2014 21:11

Let the brown rivers flow

Comments

Calingaladha 21

Saturday 18 January 2014 4:18

Running in your sleep? Or were you sliding into first?

rwcw89 2

Saturday 18 January 2014 4:49

When you poop in your dreams, you poop for real!

MissSarcasm01 18

Saturday 18 January 2014 5:13

Haven't you ever seen Family Guy?

rdnkchevy 9

Saturday 18 January 2014 6:06

Hope nobody was sleeping next to you

gabagabaheyu 10

Saturday 18 January 2014 7:47

shiiiiiiiiiiiit

cmac86 23

Saturday 18 January 2014 9:52

man and I thought peeing in your bed was a problem.

Bcfrmkc816 17

Saturday 18 January 2014 10:15

Well yes it is true you most likely have it. And it sucks. Sorry to hear about that hope you get over whatever is ailing you quickly. For me it's pain pills and night terrors. And all y'all berating oP for posting this is and FML of the worst kind I can think of.

CupOfCoffee 14

Saturday 18 January 2014 13:06

Wow, that sucks, OP. FYL

Robert1989 9

Saturday 18 January 2014 13:54

that's a shitty situation to be in.

hickdog 6

Saturday 18 January 2014 14:02

WTF?

3
4
5
6
7

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Roommate Music Singing TV shows Animals Dogs Relatable Sports Weird Love Cheating AITA Death Awkward Annoying Family Health Doctor Capitalism Money Work Drunk Concert Friends Coworkers Pranks Sextoys Intimacy

The Top

Today, my delusional parents are harassing me to donate my house to my little sister, because she's now a single mother at 17, and needs a house for the baby, but sure, I should reward her by giving her my stuff that I worked hard for, just because she can’t keep her knees together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 779

You deserved it 96

Today, I flashed my boobs at my boyfriend's boss. My boyfriend was wearing tan pants and a black sweater. His boss was wearing black pants and a tan sweater. From 100 feet away they looked the same… until my boyfriend came up behind me, wanting to know what I was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 903

You deserved it 48 499

The Top

Today, I was so stressed out from my ex harassing me that I took a chewable pill that’s made for anxiety and it broke my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 108

Today, I was in a hurry to get to work, and in my car I had two drinks settled down in my cup holder. One was my coffee, and the other was an unfinished cup of coffee where I ash and toss my cigarettes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 463

You deserved it 30 400

Today, I realized I've lived alone too long. I read 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas' to my cat. I used expression in my voice, and I made sure he could see the pictures. My son called, and I told him about it. He gave me the number for the local psychiatric ward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 536

You deserved it 9 859

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 246

You deserved it 5 658

Today, I, a woman, realized that only women find me attractive, which is fine, except that I'm straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 87

Today, my elderly neighbor called the police because my cat was in her yard. I now have a citation and a court date. Apparently, there is a leash law for cats in my town, and it is taken very seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 185

You deserved it 6 167