Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I said something grammatically wrong during it. He chose to correct it. FML
Today, my caring way too much about proper grammar got out of hand when I corrected my girlfriend during a talk about her dying grandmother. FML
Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML
Today, I finally told my girlfriend I love her. She corrected my grammar. FML
Today, something must be wrong with me. Last night, my dick went limper than overcooked spaghetti while in my wife's mouth, yet today I popped a massive boner that you could hammer nails with, while cutting the grass. FML
Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Halfway through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She now won't talk to me. FML
Today, I was chatting to a co-worker, upon whom I have a serious crush. It was going really well, until he said "irregardless", as if it's actually a proper word. This grammatical abomination really ticks me off, and I actually had to fight back the urge to beat some damn sense into him. FML
Today, I caught myself yelling at the girl in the porn I was watching for looking at the camera every other second. FML
Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML
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Top comments
satanic_fml 13
watch **** in a language you don't know
Catkam623 27
Mute it, then sit back and fill the dialogue with complex grammer sentences. You'll be done in no time.
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Comments (124)
aj9090 9
Mute.
twinkiefeets 17
Your pathetic. Get half a life at least.
baref00tmama 15
Grammar: the difference between "knowing your shit" and "knowing you're shit". PP, the contracted form of "you are" is "you're". Still. Ad infinitum.
Lomus 24
Great as being a Grammar Nazi is, this is too far. You really need a hobby OP, other than just wanking.
fuzz97 23
loser
lastday27 10
You're not the only one, my friend.
Alexx_Liz_17 9
It's sad when you're wanking to the 'sex' part, yet your brain isn't 100% focused on it, that you listen to the words they say. It's ****. They don't need to talk.
animallover0821 2
Your spelling grammar is incorrect.
lininnes 6
Try some in which they speak a foreign language you didn't know OP...
photogodess 13
So ima just let you know that's pretty crazy and you should seek therapy! No offense therapy is the only way I'm still alive, but you need help dude
SashaTheIndian 4
Would it be really ironic to say in this case that I agree, Your life sucks. ...maybe just to piss you of we could replace that we a "You're". ;)