Lost in the sauce

By klsdhjla - 15/02/2010 01:23 - United States

Spicy
Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 366
You deserved it 5 630

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You would think that would make your boyfriend proud. Like he did his job so well that you couldnt even think straight. Next time only yell out full sentences and let him know you arent that overwhelmed by him. "oh dear, I do wish you would thrust deeper, but alas, you dont have the equipment neccesary to please me!"

Comments

UziTopete 0

why is this an FML?? you just had great sex!

icall_BS 0

Because EVERYONE focuses on their partner's grammar when climaxing. Nice boyfriend you got there.

caleb865 0

There should be a "who approved this?!" button. not fml worthy...

iSwag 0

so those were his first thoughts right after sex? must be awfully dark in that colset

"Closet doors are made of all kinds of wood."

she deserved it for screwing a grammar nazi

doink 0

I bet Snickerdoodle approved it.

kayztastic 0

lol! true. be thankful you had a good "first time". mine wasn't very memorable.

FMLFML123123 0

well at least you remember who your first time was with and probably where and all the details. **** ROOFIES!

hellokittywhore 0

0_o I hope 115 was kidding lol I can just imagine what you said Ohh!! me likey very much. me want you harder!!! WANT HARDER!!!!! VERY GUD haha LMFAO!!!!!

millvillegirl218 0

#68 Fired Up reference! Greatest movie ever :)

so am I... what's an orgasam ??? can u have it with a *****?

Hells to the yes.. Fired Up is the maddest movie ever.. btw, OP, you and your bf just had sex, and then had a laugh, there is no FML here.. Unless you treasured your innocence.. Just remember: Your life isn't ******, but you just were.. ;-p

"The climax or peak of sexual pleasure which occurs during sexual activity and which in males may include ejaculation and in females vaginal contractions." --Wikitionary definition of "******." Essentially, the moment sexual activity builds up to. How intense the reaction to an ****** varies from individual to individual, but it is always an intense experience. Orgasms can result from any form of intense sexual activity. Most women should be able to induce one using a *****, and it is often considered easier than doing so with a man, as a large percentage of men are not sufficiently talented to bring their partners to ****** before they do, and after a man orgasms, he is usually sexually incapable long enough for his partner to calm down. (Because of this, many women fake orgasms in sex with their partner, but I consider this unhealthy for the relationship. Not only does it introduce deceit into what should be a very close and honest relationship (aside from casual sex, of course, as long as both partners have no moral or consentual objections), it also stifles the improvement of sexual activity within the partnership, as the man thinks he is performing in a satisfactory manner. It is also quite insulting to most males if they discover you are faking the ******.)

seriously? i've had sex a lot, and I have yet to climax. you're so lucky it happened your first time

I agree. There's nothing bad here. The boyfriend sounds kinda witty.

Agreed, you had an ****** when you first had sex? Thats a freakin win

TexasMud 8

Because she is a English major with hopes of becoming a British literature professor at a highly respected University, now that she knows this her dreams are Toast. Or at least that is what I got from her fml.

boo hoo!!! you had an ******, and then your bf told you (probably kidding) that you were blobering

I agree with #4. Who let you onto this site? Grammar complaints? Are you kidding me? I doubt he was serious and if he was, so what? You just had an ******! GTFU

Sorry but what is the gtfu? Get the ****... Under?

ltr450 2

Climaxes tend to be one word sentences or maybe two if there's an "Oh.." in it. Don't feel bad :D

You would think that would make your boyfriend proud. Like he did his job so well that you couldnt even think straight. Next time only yell out full sentences and let him know you arent that overwhelmed by him. "oh dear, I do wish you would thrust deeper, but alas, you dont have the equipment neccesary to please me!"

The chance of a girl having an ****** (much less her first one) while losing her virginity is between zero and none. FAKE.

HamsteronA 0

dudes need to stop pointing out if it's fake or not. it made me laugh, and gave me slight enjoyment. especially the comments. then yours. FAKE. noone cares if it's fake anymore dude, just enjoy yourself

how did you go about doing that research, cause in real life, where the rest of the world lives, girls CAN have orgasms during their first time. Earth's calling buddy, will you accept the charges ;)

kellianne 0

You never know, he could be really good in bed.

icall_BS 0

Or maybe she sucks in bed. Why's it always gotta be the guys that have to suck in bed?

EV34 6

it takes more to make a girl ******

sugarbabyxoxo 2

there is two different kinds of orgasms. clitoral and vaginal. maybe se rubbed her box when they were *******. like most girls do. lol so don't call fake if you don't have all the facts... vaginal orgasms are very uncommon. most girls never have one.

I had a vaginal ****** when I lost my virginity. It's definitely possible.

BritneyBiohazard 0

Duuude. It's not the OP's fault that you don't have experience with female orgasms because your penis is too tiny to please anyone.

ivy_xx 0

just because you've never given a girl an orgasim doesn't mean we can't have one our first time. congrats OP

G_thelegend 0

thats pretty true, how can you have sex without foreplay. plus, first time hurts.

kniickles 0

everyone starts mumbling shit when they come. it's cause all that pleasure fries your brains for those few seconds. wait...why is this an fml? you had an ******.

Your boyfriend's a grammar Nazi... in bed!

HamsteronA 0

DUN, DUN, DUNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!

Icarus_II 0

Wow, what a tard. I'm guessing he had more fun listining to you make grammer mistakes. maybe it's a sign.