Today, I realized my wife often switches the TV channel from the crime dramas we both like, to Hollywood gossip shows that I can't stand, just to get me to leave the room. From the other room, I can see that she switches back once I've left. She's probably been doing this for years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my wife and I were watching TV. The lady on the show began to talk about how to have a smooth divorce. My wife discreetly turned the volume up. FML
Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML
Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML
Not an Addams Family person
Today, my girlfriend spend all day pouting that I wouldn't watch 'Wednesday' with her, despite my giving the pilot a chance and hating it. Yet when I choose a show, I usually get five seconds before, "What is this? I don't like it! Turn it off." FML
Turn it off
Today, my wife whined that she couldn't sleep, while she had her eyes glued to her phone, her Switch in her lap, the TV on, and her bedside light shining in her face. I've long since learned not to comment on this. FML
Today, I began to undress my wife, who was watching TV, and gave her a massage to relax her while she watched her soap. 20 minutes later, when the programme came to an end, she said "I wish you'd let me watch TV in peace!". FML
Cold reading
Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML
Today, I found out that my wife had been debating leaving me for an old boyfriend from high school. They rekindled their relationship on Facebook, and talking on the cell phone. Both things I insisted she have. FML
Ciao!
Today, I found out that my wife of 5 years has decided to change everything: her job, clothes, hair style, car, and me. FML
Overcompensating
Today, my wife has been going to a "women's group" for the last couple of months. She now refuses to do anything around the house, blatantly spoils our daughter, and talks to our son like he's mentally incompetent. She insists that she's just "reclaiming her power" but it makes everyone else miserable. FML
Top comments
someteenager 13
Ask her why she does it
Amburito 0
Next time just take the remote from her.
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Comments (123)
javierb88 3
She's probably also ******* another dude
dopefreshh19 3
Divorce her ass !
samarch0079 0
Ok this really sucks. (deep breath) I know exactly what she's doing, because I do something pretty similar myself. When was the last time you really touched her? Or asked her questions about herself? You need to look away from the tv and look at her! Touch her leg, pull her closer, and ask her questions. Not questions you want to talk about, questions for her. She wants your attention, your love, and reasurenses that you still see her sexy. Good luck buddy, and happy holidays.
perdix 31
And when you get her good and emotionally mushy, pry the remote from her hand, handcuff her to the coffee table and switch on ESPN, you *******, limp-dick, girly-man. If she makes too much noise, well, that's why they make ball gags and duct tape ;)
elisabeth1_fml 0
So stay there and you both can suffer together.
HatefulPilot 0
Nice flame war.
MotherHen88 4
My guess is that you are someone who talks/ yells at the tv, and she just wants to watch her shows in peace without being distracted by your comments.
bizarre_ftw 22
Hide the remote. But btw, I get her position, I don't like watching shows with other people either. That, or maybe you're damn annoying to watch crime shows with, do you talk the whole time and give away the endings? If so YDI
pdp_fml 21
Actually , I think that you should confront her and ask why she does this. If she gives you an honest answer, then you could resolve an issue with her if you love her and she loves you. Merry Christmas!
DriAA7 17
So...when she takes the remote you don't say anything? You just let her change the channel even though you're watching something? Weird.
22jrdn55 15
I bet she's the same girlfriend who asked that guy to stop breathing. Get a bigger TV and watch **** when she's around you, and as soon as she leaves, switch back to whatever you like!