Today, I realized my wife often switches the TV channel from the crime dramas we both like, to Hollywood gossip shows that I can't stand, just to get me to leave the room. From the other room, I can see that she switches back once I've left. She's probably been doing this for years. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife and I were watching TV. The lady on the show began to talk about how to have a smooth divorce. My wife discreetly turned the volume up. FML
Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML
Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML
Today, my girlfriend spend all day pouting that I wouldn't watch 'Wednesday' with her, despite my giving the pilot a chance and hating it. Yet when I choose a show, I usually get five seconds before, "What is this? I don't like it! Turn it off." FML
Today, my wife whined that she couldn't sleep, while she had her eyes glued to her phone, her Switch in her lap, the TV on, and her bedside light shining in her face. I've long since learned not to comment on this. FML
Today, I began to undress my wife, who was watching TV, and gave her a massage to relax her while she watched her soap. 20 minutes later, when the programme came to an end, she said "I wish you'd let me watch TV in peace!". FML
Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML
Today, I found out that my wife had been debating leaving me for an old boyfriend from high school. They rekindled their relationship on Facebook, and talking on the cell phone. Both things I insisted she have. FML
Today, I found out that my wife of 5 years has decided to change everything: her job, clothes, hair style, car, and me. FML
Today, my wife has been going to a "women's group" for the last couple of months. She now refuses to do anything around the house, blatantly spoils our daughter, and talks to our son like he's mentally incompetent. She insists that she's just "reclaiming her power" but it makes everyone else miserable. FML
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Top comments
someteenager 13
Ask her why she does it
Amburito 0
Next time just take the remote from her.
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Comments (123)
iwadasn 33
Really, it seems like she's found a polite (or at least discreet) way of having some alone time every once in awhile. If you two had lots of problems, she'd probably start a fight and actually *tell* you to leave. The fact that she tries to spare your feelings about it is a good thing, and frankly it doesn't seem like that big an issue. You don't have to spend *all* your time together, after all.
Nicoyamom 0
Halarious..hahaha
btown1616 0
Haha love skyrim!
sat123 12
I do the same thing. I have a full day at work, I cook dinner, I do the dishes, talk with my husband for a couple hours. If he's still downstairs, it's time for Glee or Gossip Girl. Aw, you're going upstairs, honey? *pretend sad* THAT BEING SAID. Aren't there apps where you can use your smartphone as a remote? Or, universal remotes. Or, next time she does it, mosey over to her side of the couch for a nice chaste cuddle and pretend to be absorbed in the trashy show.
wazupsuckaa 0
that's messed up
Abby5212 0
that sucks , Privacy !
amandaxcookie 1
Lmao, i used to do that to my bf, only when he was being annoying, or i was mad. :P
KeeksB 0
Maybe she just changes it when commercials are on, then going back to the original when suspected on. My mother did that all the time.
usmcheins 1
You have the dick, you make the rules.
TallMist 32
Joking or not, that's very sexist.
itsameally 2
Everyone needs some "alonetime" sometimes