Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my period was a few days late, so my anxiety kicked in and I told my husband I was worried about being pregnant. He pointedly said that pregnancy requires sex, and I suddenly remembered we haven't had sex in months. I haven't cheated, but good luck convincing his suspicious ass of that. FML
Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Today, I decided I was gonna take a pregnancy test after being two months late. I bought two because I was sure it would give me a positive. That same night I got my period. FML
Today, my period was officially 2 weeks late. I have a phobia about giving birth, so I had a panic attack, went to Walmart, spend $15 on four pregnancy tests and a drink, came home, and took the tests. All four came back negative. As I went to clean up and throw everything away, I got my period. FML
Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML
Today, I have realised that since I get laid so infrequently, every time I have sex now, it kickstarts my period. FML
Today, I realized my girlfriend has been "on her period" for almost two months. FML
Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML
Today, I went into a gynecology appointment to find out my IUD had apparently fallen out without me knowing. What tipped me off? My pregnancy test. FML
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Top comments
washingtongirl 8
It's time to break that dry spell, friend. Get freaky.
andiiturtle 0
At least your not pregnant ! :)
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Comments (209)
ayeemary 0
Uh why would you spend money on pills if you are not even having sex?
Deoans 9
To all the dear stupid people commenting, preventing pregnancy is not the only reason girls take the pill. It can help a lot against menstrual pains for example and regulate their period when they have an irregular one.
saidoh_fml 26
Before I begin reading the other comments, I must say I sincerely hope there are no dumbasses on here saying if op hasn't had sex in almost a year then she shouldn't be on the pill in the first place.
saidoh_fml 26
Generic versions can be dirt cheap.
vanavril14 1
Dear all ignorant people, taking birth control is NOT just for sexual protection. It is to regulate a girls menstrual cycle, that is exactly why I take it and I am a virgin, dont need it for sexual purposes yet. TA-DAAA. go crawl back into a hole where you belong.
mollyslips 13
similar thing happened to me, but my mom thought I was pregnant because I was feeling sick and late for my period:(
oshound2 0
Sounds like my life. Havent had sex in 15 years..,
laynatrippy 2
I volunteer as tribute.
rainshower7 0
ROTFLOL.!! I'm sorry.
XxTooCoolxX 0
Atleast that you know of....