Today, I put the little boy I nanny for in time-out. In retaliation he blasted an air horn in my face. I can only hear out of one ear now. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was working at a daycare. There was a 6-year-old boy pretending to be my doctor, holding a little, plastic thermometer. He then, without warning, quickly shoved it deep into my ear. The last thing I heard was his giggle. I think I'm deaf. FML
Today, I was taking a nap on the couch when my 2 year old daughter decided that daddy needed an ear cleaning. With all the grace of toddler-hood, she stabbed me in the eardrum with a Q-tip. Now I can't hear her coming. FML
SHUT UP
Today, the neighbors' kid got a new airhorn. FML
Today, I was teaching my two year-old daughter how to take a person's temperature. While I was sitting down, she came up behind me and shoved the thermometer in my ear hard. Now I can't hear out of my right ear, and I'm in excruciating pain. FML
What's up doc?
Today, I took my 2-year-old son to the ear doctor, since he'd stopped responding whenever I call him. The doctor told me that his ears are just fine. He's just ignoring me. FML
Freakout
Today, my boyfriend trapped me in a corner of our apartment and kept making sounds that he knows cause me to become violently angry (I have misophonia). He wouldn't stop, even though I was practically begging him to, and now he's mad that I freaked out and broke his nose to get away from him. FML
What?
Today, I asked my son to repeat something he had said. He got right up in my face and screamed that it was time I got a "fucking hearing aid." His siblings agreed with him. My husband agreed so much, he won’t even punish him for yelling and swearing, because, “Honestly, we all wanted to scream it.” FML
Today, my 3 year old nephew was sitting on my knee at the computer. He was annoying me as he kept on pressing all the buttons. To scare him off I did a creepy voice in his ear that makes him cry. He turned round and broke my nose. FML
Isn't it ironic, don't you think?
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Top comments
me234 7
That sucks his parents should have to pay to get your ears checked
viper64 10
Stupid kids...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (172)
kjones_jones00 1
He wouldn't listen, and now you can't!
BrDorman 2
What?
beastmode661 4
Did you end up pimp slapping him?
skyeyez9 25
There is a boy in my daughter's class who is a brat like the one you nanny for. I spoke with his nanny and she said she was forbidden to Discipline him, and the parents never do either. As a result, he's the most obnoxious kid in the class.
Longshott 4
Then the doctor said, "well that is an odd thing to have in your rectum. How did an air horn get up there?"
mhud4911 0
that little kid needs to be popped, not put in time out!
haha8D 3
haha your like Katniss while playing in the hunger games, may the odd be ever in your favor! good luck with the ear thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!
grace12898 0
Cousin, is that you?
Shit_talkin_chik 5
Ha, you got it from a kid!
DaddyLongStroke 1
You should have whipped his ass.. Grrrr