Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis "fun-sized" for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, I knew micropenises existed, I just never expected I’d see one in person after spending weeks building my anticipation of losing my virginity, getting naked in front of him, then being presented with half a cocktail sausage. Even if we had sex I think I’d still be a virgin. FML
Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
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Top comments
runamile 4
Well no use complaining about it...Next time upgrade to king size if it bothers you so much.
amerwin 3
How have u not seen/felt/tasted his tiny until this point? Have y'all even kissed yet? Its interesting that you would just skip straight to bumping uglies without first coming across his miniature **** at least once.
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Comments (181)
ScrabbleBabe2010 0
Anyone who says size does not matter is lying to themselves. Size matters ALOT to women whether it is too big or to small. Stop being all PC and tell the truth! :) If you can't feel it, he is just not the right guy for you. If he is too big, same answer.
chaos212 10
The people that think pain and an intact hymen constitutes a virgin make me lose all hope in the fate of humanity. A virgin is defined according to the dictionary as: a person who has not had sexual intercourse. Whether or not you didn't feel it/didn't bleed from it is completely irrelevant. I don't give a **** about your morals, your still wrong. Upon further investigation, I've realized that most of these retards saying this are between the ages of 13-17. Youth is not an excuse for ignorance. All of you should go to school where they teach you this kind of shit rather than trying to learn it first hand.
zenti 2
Thank you for saying what I've been thinking! I was shocked when I saw all the comments supporting that the OP was still a virgin due to a small penis. WTF?
Sammara 0
Yes, their schools SHOULD teach them. But, not all schools do, and teens typically don't get a choice in where they go to school. That leaves them with the unfortunate option of learning first-hand or trying to sneak learning about it online or in books past their parents. If they're in an abstinence-only state, chances are most of their parents wouldn't be cool with them trying to learn about it. However, I am baffled that someone from even the most pro-abstinence school wouldn't know that a broken hymen does not mean someone is not a virgin, or vice versa. But, that further proves the need for major policy changes in our education system, specifically when it comes to making it mandatory for the school to offer comprehensive sexual education.
dunicha 20
This really makes me wonder about my friend that jokes he's hung like a tic-tac. (Usually followed by "anybody need a breath mint?")
birdman09 0
lol at least he got his. sucks for you if you didn't get yours
azzyistired 0
that poor unfortunate young man...but yeah i agree with 10. if u need some help in that area im doowwnn
babs8402 0
that blows try enzyte it worked for my lil ex
sarcdude 3
sure he's going to call you to give you a nice thank you when it falls off because of that...
XBCX96 4
Wow, you're a bitch
suprakar 0
2nd that
HahaSuks4u 0
If you need still need help I might have a king size for you
thehelp14 0
hahah you suck
stariana6 0
ur experience is kinda like mine.
pranavrave 0
hey hottii!!! how u doin????