Intimacy: Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling...

By Anonymous - 05/01/2011 20:49 - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis "fun-sized" for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 326

You deserved it 9 354

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Same thing different taste

"shortcomings"

By Anonymous - 24/02/2018 01:30

Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 906

You deserved it 631

Nuts

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 20:03 - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 833

You deserved it 6 144

By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 940

You deserved it 3 064

Bodyshaming sausages

By Anonymous - 05/01/2024 19:00

Today, I knew micropenises existed, I just never expected I’d see one in person after spending weeks building my anticipation of losing my virginity, getting naked in front of him, then being presented with half a cocktail sausage. Even if we had sex I think I’d still be a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 359

You deserved it 224

By Anonymous - 27/03/2013 16:54 - United States

Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 108

You deserved it 11 752

By Anonymous - 03/11/2012 01:23 - Canada - Bedford

Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 004

You deserved it 6 085

Absolute beginners

By dancerr2210 - 09/06/2010 04:01 - United States

Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 252

You deserved it 6 961

By Anonymous - 27/04/2013 04:11 - United States

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 618

You deserved it 15 409

By Anonymous - 04/02/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 402

You deserved it 3 889

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 003

You deserved it 4 133

runamile 4

Thursday 6 January 2011 0:13

Well no use complaining about it...Next time upgrade to king size if it bothers you so much.

amerwin 3

Thursday 6 January 2011 0:20

How have u not seen/felt/tasted his tiny until this point? Have y'all even kissed yet? Its interesting that you would just skip straight to bumping uglies without first coming across his miniature **** at least once.

Comments

ScrabbleBabe2010 0

Thursday 6 January 2011 17:42

Anyone who says size does not matter is lying to themselves. Size matters ALOT to women whether it is too big or to small. Stop being all PC and tell the truth! :) If you can't feel it, he is just not the right guy for you. If he is too big, same answer.

chaos212 10

Thursday 6 January 2011 17:52

The people that think pain and an intact hymen constitutes a virgin make me lose all hope in the fate of humanity. A virgin is defined according to the dictionary as: a person who has not had sexual intercourse. Whether or not you didn't feel it/didn't bleed from it is completely irrelevant. I don't give a **** about your morals, your still wrong. Upon further investigation, I've realized that most of these retards saying this are between the ages of 13-17. Youth is not an excuse for ignorance. All of you should go to school where they teach you this kind of shit rather than trying to learn it first hand.

zenti 2

Friday 7 January 2011 21:08

Thank you for saying what I've been thinking! I was shocked when I saw all the comments supporting that the OP was still a virgin due to a small penis. WTF?

Sammara 0

Monday 10 January 2011 6:47

Yes, their schools SHOULD teach them. But, not all schools do, and teens typically don't get a choice in where they go to school. That leaves them with the unfortunate option of learning first-hand or trying to sneak learning about it online or in books past their parents. If they're in an abstinence-only state, chances are most of their parents wouldn't be cool with them trying to learn about it. However, I am baffled that someone from even the most pro-abstinence school wouldn't know that a broken hymen does not mean someone is not a virgin, or vice versa. But, that further proves the need for major policy changes in our education system, specifically when it comes to making it mandatory for the school to offer comprehensive sexual education.