Today, I listened to a woman take an extremely fragrant crap while I waited for my pregnacy test result in the Target bathroom. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, at nine months pregnant, I stopped at a truck stop to use the restroom. I opened an unlocked stall door and stood face to face with a woman bent over wiping. She let out a scream so blood-curdlingly loud that I wet myself. FML
Today, I went to see a play. I'm pregnant, so I always need to pee. At intermission, I ran to use the bathroom, but there was a really long line. I asked the woman in front of me if I could pass her. She responded, "You don't look pregnant!", and lectured me about lying while I peed my pants. FML
Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I'm pregnant, though I don't really suffer from morning sickness. I do however suffer from sympathy puking, which kicked in with horrifying consequences when someone burst in and started vomiting in one of the other stalls. FML
Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML
Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML
Today, I was sitting in the doctor's waiting room and thought that I was alone. I let rip two massive farts before realising there was a very short woman behind the computer screen at the desk. FML
Today, I really had to go to the bathroom. Due to my fear of public restrooms, I made sure it was clear before I started. I heard someone sigh halfway through. Embarrassed, I waited a full ten minutes before leaving the stall, only to see that it was only the automatic air freshener. FML
Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML
Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML
Today, I really had to take a shit. My coworker had gone on lunch break and I was alone in the shop. There were no customers, so to the can I went. Cue a long series of loud wet farts and splashes, followed by the flush. I emerged to see the horrified face of some old lady and her grandson who'd heard everything. FML
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Top comments
harmony88 0
Surely you could have waited until you were at home to take the test....
juliadream 0
...why the Target bathroom? As opposed to the privacy of your own bathroom...?
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Comments (145)
TheTragicReturn 0
What do you think people do in public restrooms?
gormer 0
Birth control, ********, it's all the same and what did you expect trailer trash?
LOL_7052 0
And your life is ducked how...?
LOL_7052 0
typo I meant ****** not ducked
Branflakes16 0
Why the Target bathroom? Do shit like that at home if u don't wanna hear people take *****. YDI
youfools 0
I agree- why were you taking a pregnancy test in a public restroom? Sure, buy it at Target, but you really can't wait to get home?
KayOh37 0
i guess youve never been in that situation when you question whether or not the condom might have broken (even though it might be a long shot). Wouldnt you want to know whether or not you are pregnant asap? i would
Tweety122888 0
it's impossible to reason with these retarded people who obviously are rich (since target is a "shitty" store) and they don't have sex (because a slip up can happen to anybody). so this could never happen to them.
Whatsername6353 0
Yes that is gross, but why would you do that in a public bathroom? You should've deffinatly done it at home. So yeah, YDI.
minirhyder 3
Can you be any more of a redneck? F your child's life and the future of America.
perstephane 4
Yes - it could have been WalMart
saint101 0
haha nice
catatonicsleep 17
she could have been so excited about the prospect of being pregnant that she didn't want to have to wait until she got home to find out alternatively she could be desperate to not be pregnant and doesn't want anyone to know she is taking a pregnancy test
boatkicker 5
I was just going to say this. and to OP: I hope your test showed you whatever results you were hoping for. That could easily make up for tha lady beside you.
BikerMike 0
does your crap smell like roses? if no then shut up. you sound like a real winner taking a pregnancy test in a store restroom. Was no one suppose to be in the restroom while you were waiting for the + or - to show up? Don't get pissed at other people for taking a crap in a public restroom because you could not keep your legs closed