Today, I learned that no matter how much you want the Nutella, it's never a good idea to deep-throat the knife. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to lick the excess peanut butter off the knife after making a PB and J. Turns out the knife can and will cut your tongue, even though you don't think it will. FML
Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML
Today, I realised a second too late why trying to hack a popcorn kernel out from between your teeth with a steak knife is really a bad idea. FML
Today, I got headbutted for saying that Nutella is overrated. FML
Today, by being clumsy when putting my bread slices on a plate, I invented a sensational new type of sandwich: The Nutella-Salmon-Garlic Double-Decker. FML
Today, I learned a valuable life lesson : Never attempt to swallow your pills with a swig of hot tea. FML
Today, I broke my wrist because a Nutella glass fell on it after I opened the cupboard. FML
Today, I learned that, when choking on a piece of food, you can cough hard enough to partially prolapse a hemorrhoid. FML
Today, I found out that if you see a tray with some black stuff in it and you can't decide whether it's powdered black pepper or cigarette ashes, it's not a good idea to taste it. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with severe nut allergies. My dad decided to buy jars of Nutella, write "You know you want this" on them, and stick them around the house. FML
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Top comments
Readoll 13
Absolutely stupid... YDI
HowieDoIt 21
Much sharper than OP, I'm guessing.
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Comments (196)
dafuqbro24 7
You should use those deepthroating skills somewhere else.
mattorama 15
Addicted to spreadable saturated fat. YDI just on those grounds, doubly so for deep throating a knife.
Korra_fml 23
you just learned that TODAY? what are you, 4?
drshn 22
A cautious lick is OK but deep throating it is just stupidity. On the other hand it will be less painful the next time, if you know what I mean.
ThatInvisibleBoy 7
you had to try it to figure out it was a bad idea?
Makayla18_18 13
You're an idiot.
missyb94 6
I can't even fathom why you would think it was a good idea to deep throat anything sharp.
xyluna 5
please don't procreate.
jonmaster69 7
I eat the knife and wonder who the hell put nutella on it
rawlings123 17
How the hell are you even still alive? If you choke trying to eat nutella than I can't help but wonder hard difficult your life must be.