Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
To boldly go where no man has gone before
Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML
Blown job
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML
Beam me up!
Today, my boyfriend told me that we could try living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML
There must be more to this story
Today, I found out that if you’re on a date with a woman who seems interested in you and you’re both getting on really well, it won’t stop her calling you a fucking nerd and pouring her drink over you for admitting you watch anime and read a lot of books, and she will still leave you with the bill. FML
References
Today, I was talking to a smokin' hot Cuban sorority girl. She told me her mom only speaks Spanish, so she translates for her. Without thinking I said, "Oh like Chewbacca and Han Solo?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I attempted sexting for the first time. After about twenty minutes of Star Wars references, I gave up. FML
The Force
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML
Let me Slytherin
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML
Today, a cute girl was telling me about her weird fetishes. I jokingly said, "Remind me never to have sex with you". She replied, "Don't worry, I have standards". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML
Top comments
starw0lf 31
Maybe she is a Romulan?
BlackPowderMedic 5
It seems like nature's way of telling you that you don't quite have enough common sense yet, and maybe ought not reproduce.
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Comments (271)
Longblueknight 6
KHAAANNN!!!!
SkateSolid 4
I believe Star Wars is for nerds. Star Trek is for geeks. Know the difference.
Dthsapprntc 23
Oh so wrong. There are Star Wars geeks and Star Trek geeks. Being a geek simply means you are really into something to the point of obsesiveness. Google the difference between nerds and geeks, it'll be quite informative.
Wizzlbang 10
Obviously, if your partner doesn't want to hear you speaking in tongues doing intercourse, they aren't a REAL nerd. MAN I wish this FML had a wedgie button...
how_to_implode 17
I don't think OP was trying to imply that she wasn't a real nerd, only that no matter her proclaimed level of nerdiness (true or false) she won't be into it.
VoodooPriestess 16
Different likes and dislikes, but does she know Klingon? I mean you could be insulting her. And it's like German. Not a sexy language. I mean it's all harsh. . . And like sex preferences. Not into roleplayingishness?
jaybone87 8
stupid
underguarded 20
I don't think any girl is ready for Klingon . It is not a sexy language.
pandalover69 26
I'm a girl and I LOVE Star Trek but even that would creep me out.
kthsdm 12
Sheldon is that you?
sssayesss 5
Nerd. . . noun. . . 1. a stupid, irritating, ineffectual, or unattractive person. 2. an intelligent but single-minded person obsessed with a nonsocial hobby or pursuit: a computer nerd. No where in the definition does it state that I have to be obsessed with Star Wars, Comic Books, Star Trek; and while you may be obsessed with them all, it doesn't make you a bigger nerd than anyone else, just number one.
Demonbart 8
Well duh.