Today, I heard my husband telling his friend that I used to be a skank and was "easier than 1 plus 1" when we first met. I was still a virgin when we got married. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I found out my husband is still friends with someone who talks a lot of crap about me. FML
Today, I married a wonderful man. Even though both of us were no longer virgins, we decided to wait until marriage to sleep together. He just told me I was the worst he's ever had. FML
Today, according to my husband of many years, he was actually planning to ghost me after our boring first date. It was only the fact that I shagged him senseless that night that kept him around long enough for us to actually get to know each other. Hooray for me being a "loose slut" back in 1998. FML
Today, I got married. During the reception my husband got drunk and told 200+ people that we met at a dingy bar and that we "totally banged" all night. I don't know what's worse, the fact he embarrassed me in front of everyone I know, or if it was that that was not how we met. Not even close. FML
Today, my husband called me a nympho after I told him I'd ideally like us to have sex more than once a month. FML
Today, at work during lunch, a bunch of the girls were talking about their husbands and boyfriends and sex stuff. I unfortunately got involved and basically made shit up and lied my ass off because no way would they believe I’m a virgin at 37, who last had a boyfriend in high school. FML
Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML
Today, I ran into an old high school friend while out with my husband. When she inquired who I was married to, I pointed to my husband, who was looking at shirts. She laughed and said, "No really?", insinuating that I couldn't get anyone that good looking. FML
Today, I met an old friend, who accidentally revealed he once met my wife in a club. They were both drunk and she let him have anal sex with her for a fiver in a club toilet. FML
Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and everyone believes I'm a swinger. Because of this, no girl wants to go out with me, in case they become just another notch under my belt. The truth is, I'm still a virgin. FML
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Top comments
Druu 53
He's sleeping on the couch tonight. Foregone conclusion. Easier than 1+1.
Wizardo 33
Seems like he was trying to act like a big boy in front of his friends, tell his mother and then see what happens, prick.
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Comments (140)
Kheasus 8
Well, to me, this just sounds like him being a guy and trying to one up something his buddy said. However, that's still something that he shouldn't be saying as it's beyond rude to you. I wouldn't give it much more thought than that. I hope you two worked everything out and he knows he has a few boundaries there! :)
deathskittlez 6
Your life doesn't suck, your husband does.
xLemonLimex 6
One word. Douche Bag. Oh is that two words? 1+1 i guess. Sorry, OP. Hes a dick.
amadisdemitrius 5
oh ya? ive heard that before... how many dicks have you sucked?
txfarmgirl71 1
ssssooooo....how's the single life? gotta be better than with him...just sayin
NightingaleAnne 5
I think he might have been implying that you sleep together regularly, since you clearly wanted it a bunch before. Who knows... men can be real jerks.
smithv171 17
That's ignorant. I don't understand why he would say something so rude like that about you
ABarrelHorseGirl 8
You made a typo! Ex-husband*
IGaveRickUp 15
This isn't okay to say about ANYONE. Even if she wasn't his wife, we shouldn't degrade people based on their sexual activity. Especially not the way we slutshame women today if they even try to own their sexuality the slightest. Seriously, no matter what situation this is NOT ok. Actually, it's a very long distance from ok. These structures are about as ok as being assfucked by a Christmas tree. Yeah, that's all I had to say.
carbonbasedcynic 17
it was a mean way of saying the chemistry made the relationship smooth sailing.