Today, I had to use my butthole to negotiate with my husband so I can get a new tattoo. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had to negotiate with my husband so he would bring me toilet paper while I was on the john. His terms? A blowjob. FML
Today, I realized my husband and I have been fighting a lot lately, so to show him how much I care, I got a tattoo with his name on it. He hates it. FML
Deep ink
Today, I'm going to get my first tattoo. Too bad it's inside my colon so the surgeon can mark the section to remove. FML
Jumping the gun
Today, I got a tattoo with my boyfriend's name on it. As we're coworkers, I showed it to him thinking he’d love it. He told me he couldn’t continue the relationship anymore since he realized he wants to fix things with his wife. Three hours of pain and 2 years down the drain. FML
Grossed out
Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML
Today, I found out the tattoo symbolising my marriage turned out to be more permanent than the marriage itself. FML
Today, I found out that my wife is leaving me for a tattoo artist. I was in rehab and she met him getting a tattoo as a surprise for me. FML
Nice mental image
Today, I had no choice but to unclog a toilet with my bare hands. FML
Nice
Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
Top comments
nasek718 2
Iguess this is a FMA not FML
soccerguy77 0
negotiation buttseks??:O
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Comments (213)
WarriorOmen 25
The Barter System, still going strong.
kjlancaster 21
What was it? A tramp stamp?
fromtxnotcowboy 12
Dont we all??? The key is to get the thing we desire first and just backout last minute jajajaa
send3426 24
It's your body, you shouldn't have to negotiate anything. If you want a tattoo, get one.
drc2010 13
Face it, you are kinky as **** and wanted to do that with your husband. Then make up some stupid story saying you needed to negotiate. I have never had to stoop that low, but my husband still pays for all my tattoos.
kenyrabit 25
Sounds like prostitution
suppppppppppppp 6
Really? He let you? What are you, some house pet.
Astrobomb 21
yepp been there
ashlyrose45 12
if it's a money thing I say good for him. if it's just because your hubs doesn't want you to have tats I say too bad and it's your body!
maserle 8
That's nice?