Today, I'm going to get my first tattoo. Too bad it's inside my colon so the surgeon can mark the section to remove. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
Today, because of my life situation, I was told I'll have to have a colonoscopy without anesthesia. FML
Today, my colon got perforated during a routine colonoscopy. Apparently, it's a rare complication and I have no legal recourse. So now I'll need to use a colostomy bag for the next 6 months until I can get surgery to fix their mistake. FML
Today, at the age of 25, for the first time in my life, I was lying mostly naked in front of a man while he was inserting something in my body. Too bad that man was a doctor and that thing was a colonoscopy. FML
Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. Fifty minutes into the tattoo on my back, the artist said, "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML
Today, I have a tattoo of my daughter, who died when she was 11, and I had to have surgery on that body area. I told the surgeon very clearly to cut around the tattoo and he assured me he would. Woke up and the bastard had cut through my daughter's face, and half her face is now under scars and stitches. FML
Today, I was informed by my proctologist that my colonoscopy has been rescheduled for my birthday. FML
Today, after months of planning, I finally got my first tattoo: my cat's paw print. I love it so I showed my friends pictures. One said it looks like poop and the other said it looks like I have a disease. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a "talk." So now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off, only to learn that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
So, it's quite literally a semi-colon tattoo.
oGxFoopFoop 15
I hate you, that shouldn’t have been so clever
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Comments (2)
RichardPencil 32
So, it's quite literally a semi-colon tattoo.
oGxFoopFoop 15
I hate you, that shouldn’t have been so clever
genuinegoodguy 9
I survived a major operation of resection. Long and definitely FML journey but in the end you’ll be ok. Also do not get a visible tattoo.