Animals: Today, I had to moisturise my dog's testicles because they got...

By Anonymous - 04/08/2010 10:24 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to moisturise my dog's testicles because they got sunburnt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 345

You deserved it 7 940

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Same thing different taste

By julian1 - 19/08/2015 11:34 - United States - Orlando

Today, I decided to sunbathe in my backyard in an attempt to be healthy. The result? Insect bites over my body. Somehow, despite being fully clothed the entire time, my scrotum also received several bites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 058

You deserved it 10 552

By miss tomato - 08/06/2012 16:36 - United States

Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 496

You deserved it 5 666

It's a doggy dog world

By Anonymous - 31/10/2019 02:00

Today, I was bathing my dog at a self-serve dog wash at a pet store. The person next to me decided to express his dog's anal glands, and the vile, greasy, fish-smelling liquid hit me on the side of my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 295

You deserved it 158

By anonymous - 24/09/2011 15:22 - United States

Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 384

You deserved it 4 705

By Username - 17/07/2011 19:59 - United States

Today, after applying sunscreen to myself every two hours, I still got sunburned. Through my clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 320

You deserved it 4 668

Alexa, play "Hot Hot Hot" by The Cure

By Talented73 - 07/07/2021 16:01 - United States - Yonkers

Today, we're in the middle of a heatwave. When I woke up this morning, I noticed that my scrotum was stuck to the side of my leg from all the perspiration. I had to actually peel it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 148

You what now?

By ashley anne - 16/10/2022 04:00

Today, I was called a wimp for getting a sunburn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672

You deserved it 145

Life's a beach

By Brittanyy_leigh - 17/12/2009 07:57 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 143

You deserved it 6 014

By not as scarred as he should be - 18/10/2012 18:19 - Canada - Cambridge

Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 756

You deserved it 3 341

Sneaky boy

By anonymous - 15/12/2015 06:00 - United States - Huffman

Today, I decided to give my dog a bath. Instead, my dog gave me a bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 983

You deserved it 3 869

antbait11 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:29

did he redrocket on you?

ArtIsResistance7 1

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:31

lol. It rubs the lotion on the skin... I bet your dog will never look at you the same.

Comments

The_Anwser 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:37

bahaha most action op's gotten in months

Lumpy760 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:38

wow man make someone else do it for 5 bucks then after they are done just be like " HA I didn't have 5 bucks "

helen_ellexo 22

Sunday 30 June 2013 1:00

So act like you're 5 you mean?

Phase 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:40

eww FYL

just_nicole 1

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:41

ummm I wouldn't do tht... O.o I bet yu don't look at yur dog the same way anymore..lol

xXxbiancaxXx 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:42

ummm ewww that's kinda nasty don't ya think!!! blehhh

sleepyhungry93 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:43

wow. there isnt much to be sed about this one.

Jimboom 11

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:46

As long as you didn't enjoy it then your ok.

GrooveSponge 0

Friday 10 June 2011 6:07

Cleveland says you are epic. :D

mollylollypops 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:48

gross gross gross!

conor19 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:48

at what point does a dog flip over thinking a rly need to tan my balls.

FarSide 22

Wednesday 4 August 2010 18:01

dog was laying in tanning bed with her...

selenagirl_fml 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 19:01

he wasn't happy with his pale-colorless balls....

jennniferlea 4

Thursday 5 August 2010 3:39

the kind that knows if he does he will get a ball rub....Dogs are smarrrrrrrtttt!!!

triggerit 5

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:48

good experience...will be useful for your b/f...

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Today, a person I've never met called me a whore and spat on me. Why? Because I was babysitting for my neighbors and answered the door for two well dressed women passing out religious pamphlets. I politely declined to take any. Apparently being a 15 year-old girl caring for a toddler makes me a sex worker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 535

You deserved it 60

Today, my grandma drove me home from school early because I was sick. I went upstairs and heard my parents having sex. Embarrassed, I ran downstairs and was about to leave the house when I saw a car pull into the driveway. It was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 824

You deserved it 254

The Top

Today, while teaching at a daycare, a child came up to me and asked if he could go to the bathroom. Obviously, I said it was fine. He then pulled his pants down, and pee on my brand new shoes, and all over my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 065

You deserved it 4 727

Today, marks the third week in which my girlfriend has gone without taking a shower. She does this every so often, taking showers roughly once per month. She's convinced baby wipes will "hold her over". FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 686

You deserved it 9 760

Today, I was walking home when I made eye contact with some guy, just being friendly. He then started rapping at me while pointing at his dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 082

You deserved it 4 635

Today, I was taking advantage of an empty house to try and re-spark my sex drive. Despite my best efforts, I got bored and started watching something else, but when my housemate returned suddenly, I panicked - gave a guilty shout and fumbled my dick away as I changed the monitor over - back to porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 167

You deserved it 717

Today, I received a card in the mail. It was from my vet's office. Written inside was "We send our sympathy during this trying time." I haven't been home in three days. I can't find my dog and my mother won't talk about it. My dog was 7. She hated that dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 638

You deserved it 2 748

Today, both my mom and I are very ill, while her boyfriend is perfectly fine. Somehow, this means that I’m the one having to take care of my mom, myself, the household and 6 pets, while he does nothing, goes on trips and leaves dirt all over the house when he’s here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 996

You deserved it 120

Same thing different taste

It's a doggy dog world

Alexa, play "Hot Hot Hot" by The Cure

You what now?

Life's a beach

Sneaky boy

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