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  billyz77  |  24

If that were possible, most of us would have new parents. I've been collecting money all my life and I still don't have enough to afford a new father to help me through my early life while mine was busy with other interests. I stopped trying years ago and now I spend my money on toys!! Maybe OP can find his way like I did. Best of luck to you.

  billyz77  |  24

"Take naked pictures of yourself and hide 'em in his sock drawer and you can Get a New Daddy. Get a New Daddy." Classic.
That's one of their funniest songs, 74, but I think "Getting High With Dinosaurs" was a bit more popular.

  yresim  |  12

77 - Good song. But there's easier ways to get a new daddy. Like telling your mom he beat you and pawned your new xbox for beer money.

  Pleonasm  |  34

Not even close.
How slow must you be to arrive on the FML with zero comments, and take so long to think of some shitty comment, choose "first" as your comment, that you subsequently come 6th?

EDIT: AHA, she wrote "first" then changed it to this. You're not fooling us.

By  perdix  |  29

If you are in a car that can travel at 30 miles per hour, and your destination is 10 minutes away, then the most humilating part is:

A) Your dad is attending a baby shower
B) He's wasting money sending you to ACT Prep classes
C) He can't hold his liquor
D) 5 miles
E) All of the above.

This is to make up for the 10 minutes of class you missed and this one will be on the actual test. For the answer, you'll have to sign up for perdix' ACT Prep Class.

  Coop817  |  19

He only was there for the first 10 minutes. Assuming the class was two hours long, how much time (in minutes) did he miss?

A) 10
B) 50
C) 100
D) 110

Hint: not 10 minutes

  Pleonasm  |  34

Well, I picked A and B for the last question, so for this one I will pick C and D, to cover most of the bases.
Isn't that how we do multiple choice questions?

  Javee  |  17

Uh..duh..too hard, brain shut-down activate.
Where do I sign up? Shut up and take my money!

I'm not from The United States, is this test very arduous?

  perdix  |  29

#29, well, the Math section is pretty straightforward, but the Obstacle Course is murder! Crossing that rickety rope bridge over the pit of snakes was super-hard.

  I_iz_B_a_troll  |  23

I would find the most embarrassing part of that is that your car can only go 30 miles per hour, even a smart car could beat that! Baby shower partiers don't really disturb me...