By why yes, I do mean "ex-boyfriend" - 17/08/2013 22:40 - Netherlands - Oosterwolde

Today, I got sent home early because a large fire broke out at work. I was greeted by the sight of my cocktard of a "boyfriend" making out on my sofa with another woman. He actually had the audacity and brass balls to claim he thought she was me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 60 675
You deserved it 4 267

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He's an absolute idiot. Break up with that jerk.

He'll need those brass balls for the kicking you should give him


He's an absolute idiot. Break up with that jerk.

Yep, I should have realised the obvious. Facepalming at myself.

1PersonIsMyWorld 22

Anyone else think its pretty obvious op is a regular fml reading because of her name? Since people usually reply "u mean ex boyfriend" to these types of fmls. It's like op answered beforehand.

63, yeah, but obviously doesn't have an account. Kinda disappointing really.

Not a single person made an "You mean your ex-boyfriend" joke. Im absolutely astonished.

p00p0nt0ast 10

Because of OP's name, dummy :P

At least he didn't say "it wasn't me.."

The_9th_Doctor 18

sorry to hear that. at least you found out now before you decided to get married

Jake_Hale 7

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

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Jake_Hale 7

and getting drunk enough to make out with another woman while op is at work is also grounds for breaking up anyways

19 - Maybe that guy who killed a small child with his car was drunk. If so, we should forgive him. Yeah, that logic doesn't check out 19.

The_9th_Doctor 18

yea, I doubt he was drunk. some guys are just cheating assholes

hcollins1 18

19, even if I do get drunk, I still know what I'm doing. Just because you drink does not mean it's ok to cheat or anything else. It's still cheating regardless of the situation.

19 even if he was drunk that is no excuse for cheating. OP did the right thing by dumping him.

When I get drunk, well I know I'm gonna be...

He'll need those brass balls for the kicking you should give him

Even though he ****** up that bad, and he deserves to be dumped, but he doesn't really deserve that. He could turn OP in for sexual harrassment.

kicking someone in the balls isn't sexual harassment, it's assault.. who cares really lol

With how she said "My Sofa" implys it's her residence. They are intruders.

Not necessarily her residence, they could live together and still have separate articles so long as they didn't jointly pay for it

you would be horrified if a guy posted that his girlfriend was cheating on him and the commenters were telling him to beat her up.

THANK YOU, 104! i hate how some girls think they can be sexist all they want, but guys cant.

QueenOrangeSoda 21

Yes. The double standard is so silly, and I'm saying this as a female--just because it benefits my gender doesn't mean I should think it's okay. Domestic abuse is NOT acceptable, and it's an issue of human rights, not gender.

Gothicbunnyx3 16

Dump his ass, he doesn't deserve you. I just absolutely hate cheaters.

read her username. i take it she did.

Pwn17 25

Kick his balls till they aren't brass anymore. Edit: Damn 3. You win this round.

I'd kick my gf in the ****** if she cheated on me.

PeaceIsFree 9

What an absolute dingle ****! You deserve so much more

Pwn17 25

FML: Teaching people colorful insults since 2008.

Thumps down for "dingle ****" sounds like something you blurt out when not knowing what to say.

So he's a cocktard AND a dingle ****??? I don't think he deserves the attention of two awesome (if insulting) nicknames!

Damn 50 dislikes! Im sorry i will thumbs up...

"Cocktard" and "brass balls" just yes. You definitely deserve a boyfriend that is much better. And not a cocktard.

I'm liking the name OP. Good choice!

Sometimes stupidity is mistaken for " brass balls "