I predict a large number of comments containing the phrase "dump him".

"honey you took exploited my stupidity we can't be together"

*insert "dump the bastard", "you deserve better", and "sounds like a keeper!" comments below*

15: why is there a "took" in your comment?

29: sorry sexy ass girl! I didn't see that

The boyfriend should dump you. He deserves better. You sound like a "keeper." Like that?

Bingo, 54! You get a cookie, and a smiley-face sticker. XD

I guess he's not man enough to just ask for some cuddle time.

He's Barney! Next he'll tell her he has poison in his winker and needs someone to suck it out. And yes, she'll be a hero.

25- That's an... odd connection to make.

How so? Barney (from How I Met Your Mother)tells ridiculous lies to sleep with women. I think the connection is quite clear.

31- That's much clearer. I don't watch How I Met Your Mother, so my mind jumped to a certain purple and green dinosaur.

Haha oh valid confusion on your part. I don't think Barney Rubble even has a penis to be sucked. I will recommend, if not insist, that you watch How I Met Your Mother, though.

Not man enough to ask for a cuddle during sex?

43-he wasn't talking about Barney Rubble from the Flinstones, however that's what my first thought was when I saw your post.

Barney Rubble isn't a dinosaur?! My childhood has been a lie...wait, never mind, the cake is the lie.

^ I believe you are confusing Dino and Barney.

Lol was Dino purple and green as well?

Yes if anything it shows his dedication to the safety of your home

or it could have been a snake!!

Oh-oh, I guess some people don't read ALL the recent FMLs..

I don't think so. It's obviously Dobby, the house-elf! (rest his soul)

Casper the Horny Ghost!

22-Dobby came back as a poltergeist because he has unfinished business with the laundry and dishes :3

Agreed, FYL because your boyfriend would try to scare you like that, but YDI for thinking it was ghosts.

41 - YDI seems pretty harsh in this FML. There's nothing WRONG with believing in ghosts and I don't think it makes you dumb either. It's just a different belief from yours, you don't have to accept it but you shouldn't judge them for it either. Unless they're acting bat shit crazy like some supernatural enthusiasts. Then yeah, never mind, they're pretty annoying.

And I don't think the boyfriend is an asshole.. Maybe the girlfriend was being neglectful and that was the only way he could get to spend any time with her.. Guys need loving too

You don't know that ghosts aren't real, and one wouldn't be stupid for believing in them.

You sort of deserve it because you know, ghosts don't exist. If you approached with respect to reality you'd have saved yourself some time.

I don't personally believe in the supernatural, but I don't think people that do are complete idiots other than those guys from Ghost Hunters. They are idiots.

Ghost are real. My neice is 3 and saw my grandmother. If you dont think they are real so be it but dont talk about people cause they do.

Lies! I shall call Sexual Harrasment-Chipmunk back from the grave to haunt you. I think you can guess why he's dead.

Hey, i don't agree with his methods, but maybe he wanted to spend more time with his girlfriend and didn't know how to go about it.

How is it devious? :p would you like the extra "love"?

^ I'm trying, unsuccessfully, to 'Connect the Dots' in your comment.

Haha lol

I'm not a shopping list.... I'M A GHOST!

That's a good thing to know

Just tell me, if you got home and everything was pushed to the side and flipped you wouldn't think something was up?

Ya she thought there was some "Paranormal Activity" going on at her house.

Paranormal activity? More like abnormal asshat. (that's catching on!)

53 - I'd think something was up, by my mind would not jump to "OMG, ghosts!" My first reaction would be to believe it was a prank of some kind and set a trap for the prankster.

My first reaction wouldn't necessarily be ghosts. It'd be "my boyfriend is an asshole and moved everything around." Because he would actually do something like that.

My first thought would be, that the place got robbed.