By Anonymous - 05/04/2014 14:27 - United States - Plymouth

Today, I found out that the squeaking I've heard for the past three months, that I thought was my guinea pig, is actually my girlfriend cheating on me with my older brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks 76 589
You deserved it 7 344

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Kick your brother's ass and dump the girl.

I'm assuming the squeaking sound is coming from the bed, not the brother...


For a second there I got a mental image of Miss Piggy squealing.. Awkward. P.s. OP, you can do better than this girl.

Hey, at least you don't make squeaking noises during sex !

I'm assuming the squeaking sound is coming from the bed, not the brother...

Lol now I'm just imagining someone in the middle of having sex being like, "Ohhh yes, oh squeak!!!"

#8 I assumed the squeaking was coming from the girlfriend, probably trying to be quiet (heard from a distance). But I guess a regular squeak from the bed could sound like a guinea pig running on its wheel. :)

I have nothing but sympathy for you OP :(

58, Guinea pigs should not run on wheels, it will damage their spine because they are not meant to bend backwards like that. I think OP means the noise guinea pigs make, called wheeking. It is rather cute when you hear it! :)

114, In this instance, I think not.

xbrit551 13

how could that sound like a guinea pig

72 - Yeah, let's drag a third party into your ruined love life and spread their nudes around. Very mature, there definitely isn't a better way to handle the situation.

I don't really think that fixes the situation...

squeky bed does sound similar to them go buy one lol

72's comment is gone and all the replies are making me wonder what it said...

108, Me too. Anyone care to fill us in?

I don't remember it quite clearly but I think it had to do with OP dragging a girl in to get revenge on his girlfriend, blah blah blah. Something stupid like that.

The jist of it was that OP should **** some randomer, get some nude pictures of them and then send the nudes to the cheating girlfriend because that's what 72 did.

Kick your brother's ass and dump the girl.

Physical violence for the male, small punishment for the female! Yeah!

euphoricness 28

And don't forget to treat the guinea pig for being more loyal than your girlfriend

Well, it's not like he can kick his girlfriends ass. The worst he could do is reveal it to people and let the ****-shaming commence (but I doubt that would phase her). Regardless, his brother deserves something less than kind to come his way. His brother went along with it for three months, never once hinting at the fact OP's girlfriend is terrible. Hopefully karma gets them both back.

He could, in fact, kick his girlfriend's ass if he wanted to. Let's get rid of the double standard involving guys hitting other guys but not girls. Horrah!

He could, but then he'd be in a jail cell as his brother and girlfriend screwed each other even more. I'm pretty sure he's going to search for a move involving a win-win for himself.

No real man would ever physically harm a woman.

#53, even though violence is usually never the way to go, that's a very sexist thing to say.

yeah wait till some crazy lady is trying to stab you what then lol

But that's self-defense and easily justified.

hunteryager 18

53 no respectable person would ever harm anyone without good reason. Violence should be condemned either way, no matter of gender.

cryssycakesx3 22

any reason good enough to hit a man is good enough to hit a woman.

StiffPvtParts 43

actually I believe it us justified to beat up the male in this scenario being it is his BROTHER. siblings hurt each other over less. I also think, though its my opinion, that his own brother did that to him is worse than her just cheating.

His brother is his flesh and blood, they grew up together, they're supposed to love each other. Girlfriends are not as permanent. So yeah, it's the brother that his the true betrayal and his ass OP should be kicking.

A07 48

Am I the only one noticed that it was OP's 'Older hence hard to kill' brother?

You should never hit a woman. Unless she deserves it!

A male is physically stronger than a female. A man should never hit a woman. EVER!! There's no valid justification that can be given. If OP has a sister, let her loose on the *****. Or tell your mum what the ex did. She can kick your brothers ass and beat the shit out of the bitch, it's an even match then. Plus, mums have a "special" way of dealing with things.

If a girl has the balls to put her hands on a man, he'd better hit her back.

If a girl has the balls to put her hands on a guy, something has to be said about her mental state at the time. No woman in her sane mind would put up fisticuffs against a guy. A real man would restrain her in a bear hug or something to that effect, or simply walk away. The only time I ever raised my fist to a guy was after he punched me in the face, fracturing my eye socket and cheek bone. That was an extreme situation where I felt I was going to be beaten to death. We can be conniving, vicious and mental but we never deserve to be hit.

@139 I'd rather be beaten up by a dude than have a girl mentally and emotionally abuse me... a few seconds is better than a few years

@145 To say you would prefer one form of abuse over another is repugnant. One goes hand in hand with the other and where there is one form at the start, the other eventually occurs and a cycle is formed. If you wish to discuss abuse, mental or physical, pm me as I don't wish to be a hijacker.

#143 "we never deserve to be hit". First, you can't decide what you deserve by yourself. Other people decide it, if you involve them in something. Also, this sentence sounds like you're giving yourself a free pass for any kind of abuse towards a man without physical consequences."a male is physically stronger than a female" well if you want to go all the way down the stereotype road, I'll say that women are way better at verbal and emotional abuse than men, and therefore should never use it on men. No double standard. Both fighting method are equally violent, not in the same way. I'm a man, verbally and emotionally bullied by most people I knew in junior high, and I wish I got beaten up instead, because it hasn't as much long-term consequences, and the non-physical forms of abuse were so insidious that I couldn't even explain what happened exactly. Personnally, I am physically weaker than a lot of women, so a bear hug is usually out of question. If a woman goes apeshit on me, the simplest solution I have is a quick punch to the breastbone. Not that harmful and forces you to stop right away. Now in this case, physical violence isn't justified against the girl because shaming her in front of everyone OP knows is much more efficient.

You should never, ever, EVER Hit or even raise your voice to a woman. EVER. No matter the circumstances. And yes, this includes self-defense.

StiffPvtParts 43

I see that my comment regarding my disapproving view on hitting women is being down voted... Let me just clarify that I'm not defending OP's bitch ex, I just know how devastating an abusive relationship can be and I honestly don't believe that anyone deserves to be trapped inside one.

139 I think in self defense you should hit a woman. Like if you have a psycho ex girlfriend coming at you with a weapon, you pop that bitch a few times in the face

hunteryager 18

149 you're making yourself sound like an idiot and indicating that women have a higher status than men. I suppose your username is an indication of your maturity level and poor opinions.

She's keeping it in the family! Nasty b!tch

I think it's even worse that his own brother betrayed him. Especially an older brother, whom one might expect to be doling out dating advice to lil bro.

I don't think those sounds are anything alike...

toxic_walrus 15

You clearly don't have guinea pigs. They literally sound like a squeaky bed, or sometimes like the sound of someone cleaning a window

samy_yo 12

The squeaking is from the bed not the brother dumb shit

What about NO? How do you imagine a guy sounding like a guinea pig?

Some people's common sense, or lack of, astounds me. Also find it astounding how his brother can bang his gf next door and him never even know his gf was in the house.

I have 2 guinea pigs. Sometimes their squeaking can sound like my bed.

The sex noises people make are amusingly weird.

Um I'm pretty sure a bed squeak doesn't sound like anything but a bed squeak. It's a pretty distinct sound I don't know how that gets confused for a Guinea pig

toxic_walrus 15

Speaking a as someone who has guinea pigs, at times they do Sound like a squeaky bed

WELL NO ONE ASKED THE TOXIC WALRUS! ....Actually that was very insightful and interesting thanks for telling me.

Can also be the sound of denial he is hearing. I don't know a human being that could mistake it for an entire 3 months without investigating the noise once or twice. Sounds like a real life Dale Gribble kind of thing...

samy_yo 12

way to be a bitch viva_la_blondes! no one asked for you to comment on here either

uhm sammy yo she was beung sarcastic and trying to be funny. read the whole comment

@calucalay being*. Gosh, why is everyone on this thread so irritated! Isjahsdhuhs

you ever own one and hear the crazy squeaks they let out they sound the same through doors

oops sorry Im on my phone and its a hassle

And why does #42 get thumbed up and I get thumbed down? That was exactly what I meant in my comment as well! Sex bed squeaks are way too rhythmic to sound like a little animal making some noises. There's no way he didn't catch on after a few minutes let alone a few months.

Jessj958 19

You just went about it the wrong way #127. Yes a lot of people are sarcastic and joking, but you kinda sounded bitchy.

I agree ^ They obviously don't respect you enough to even try to be secretive about it. That sucks,OP. Good luck finding a girl worthy of your time.

Being secretive about it wouldn't make it any better and if it was a squeak sound and nothing bigger than that then they were try to be secretive about it. It's just all bad